Poseidonology (ON HIATUS)
by panclarks
Summary: Bella suffers from Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, constantly stirring up worst-case scenarios in her head. When what she calls The Universe steps in and takes away the boy she loves, will she be able to find and regain love- and herself- again? Will eventually add lemons because I know you guys like them lemons. Involves minor character death, alcohol, and drugs. BxE AH OOC
1. You

**WARNING/IMPORTANT: This story may and will contain mature themes such as sex, underage drinking, and subtle hints of drug use. The beginning of the story also contains a minor character death that involves a traffic accident, so if any of these themes make you feel uncomfortable, I strongly, STRONGLY suggest that you do not continue reading. Thank you for understanding.**

* * *

**Prologue**

I remember the last time we'd decided to take the bus together. You had me waiting, tapping my foot against the yellow tiles of the waiting shed's flooring, my heart skipping countless beats every time I would see someone that I thought was you. Almond eyes, almond eyes. Black hair and almond eyes. Five minutes passed. Ten minutes. Twenty. I thought you wouldn't show. I closed my eyes as I increased the volume of the jazzy beat I was listening to, trying to drown away my worrying. "Of course you would show," I told myself, hesitantly. "You always show."

~o~

When I first met you, I was dazed. "Michael" they would call you in our little class, and you would jerk your head around and smile to Tyler Crowley, or Lauren Mallory—whoever it would have been—who called you from across the room, while waiting for Mr. Banner to arrive with his Wednesday lecture. You held your Les Paul casually, practicing your piece for Music next period. We weren't allowed to bring instruments outside of the Practice Hall but of course, you were always so rebellious.

Right then and there, I decided to call you out. "Michael," I said. "Do I owe myself the pleasure of meeting your Gibson Les Paul?"

"Her name is Eleanor." You laughed. "She's new, like you."

"Bella Swan." I reach out my hand.

"Michael McConnell. How are you liking it here?"

I smiled. "I'm liking it just fine."

~o~

And then, as if on cue, I felt your usual cold sweat against my palms, fingers intertwining with mine. I looked at you and you smiled. "Hey," you greeted, and warmth suddenly engulfed me, and I let myself drown. Everything will be okay, I told myself. You were here, next to me. We were going to step inside the bus as soon as it arrived, and we would make our way to school. We were going to trade playlists from Alice in Chains like we do every morning, and I would rant about how the bad thoughts wouldn't leave my head, but also how I seemed to calm myself down whenever you're around. You would run your long fingers across my hair and tell me everything will be okay.

And I believe you.

Everything will be okay.

But that was then, and this is now.

Now, I sit alone, the cold of the tiled floor uncomfortable against the soles of my feet. My eyes wet and pouring, I grab my cellphone and search again, frantically, for the last message you sent me before the unthinkable happened.

"I heard you signed us up for Marine Biology elective classes. Err… not too keen with the idea, but whatever floats your boat. Also, why do they call it Marine Biology? It's such... a long-ass name. Why don't they call it something like Poseidonology, instead?"

I cried some more.

"Bella, honey?" my mom, Renee, knocked on the door with force, her voice shaking with panic. "Honey—honey it's been three days. We need to get you out of there." The usual velvet of her voice is gone and instead is replaced with countless layers of anxiety, and tears. I had been locked up in my room since the accident happened. Sleep was not an option—I would dream about your almond eyes. Your black hair and almond eyes. My regular intake of three meals a day was reduced to just leftover peanut butter crackers every 6 hours. I wanted to disappear from this world. My light was gone.

"Miss Swan?" A different voice this time, a male voice, called from the door. "Miss Swan, I want you to stay where you are. We're going to break down the door, and we're going to get you, all right?"

I shook my head slowly while my eyes stared into nothing. "Stay here." I whispered to myself. "Stay here, with me."

_Bang._

The door was gone, and so were my thoughts of you as the open space where the door used to be revealed my mother's face filled with fear and worry; my older brother, Jasper's face that showed tears, the first time I've ever seen them; and of the two other unknown men dressed in blue, walkie-talkies in their hands.

"We've got her," They shouted. "We've got her."

-V-

"Bella, honey, you haven't touched your cereal", Renee said as she called me out of my stupor. It's been two days since the men in blue knocked down my door to get me from my room—I was rushed to the hospital within minutes. They'd sedated me, and as my consciousness started to stumble into oblivion I could hear my family, my mother and Jasper, cry out the words "suicide attempt" frantically, over and over.

"Bella, honey, your cereal." My mother called out again, this time almost sounding apologetic.

I, to be honest, couldn't really care less about cereal right now. Cereal, as of yet, is the least of my worries. I was going to start school again, and in this small town of Forks, Washington, rumors were bound to have already risen.

And it's been a week since the accident.

~o~

I remember opening my Facebook account to ask Angela if there had been any homework for World Lit. That's all I wanted to find out. World Lit homework. But as I pressed the small, blue "Log In" button, my wall has started to drown itself with several short messages, messages from people I barely knew, people who knew me. Who knew us.

"_My deepest condolences to you and Michael's family, Bella." _One of the messages read. Actually, no—_all _the messages read almost the same thing.

"_Condolences to you, Bella."_

"_Our prayers and thoughts are with you Bella."_

"_I hope you're doing okay. Condolonces."_

I knew none of these people actually gave a shit. Not as much as I did. As I do.

I shut down my laptop immediately, and before I knew it I tasted the salt of my tears as they run down through my cheeks. And I tried to stop them, but I couldn't will them to—the only person I wanted to call, to rant to, the only person I expected to be here for me at this moment… was gone. Forever.

I screamed as I felt myself suddenly throwing everything in sight at the wall; my phone, picture frames that held photos of me and my friends, my family; the bottle of prescription medication that I needed for the bad thoughts to stop. I slid down to the floor, feeling absolutely helpless, pathetic.

~o~

"Mom I-I don't think I can go to school today, mom." I said matter-of-factly to Renee, who had suddenly stopped whatever she was doing, just glad to hear me strong enough to say a few sentences.

"Oh sweetheart," she cried, silently. I felt her eyes well up as she pressed her face against my shoulder.

"It'll be okay." She continued. "If there's anything you need I'm just a text away. You have your new phone with you?"

I didn't think I could make it past school today, but I didn't want to argue with my mother either. I've put her through enough.

"Yeah, I—I do." I stuttered.

"Well go on then, you'll be late." She smiled behind her tears. "You can drive? Your brother can drive for you, if you want."

I nodded.

My mom called out from below the stairs, and suddenly my brother, Jasper, came rushing down the wooden steps of the staircase with his backpack slung on one shoulder, his dirty blonde hair caught in a tangled mess.

"Get yourself a comb, will you?" I smiled silently. His jaw almost dropped to the floor, surprised and relieved that I was joking in the midst of everything that was happening.

"I'm driving, okay Bells?" he said, ignoring my rhetoric.

And just like that, we're off to the foyer, out the garage, into our old SUV, and driving to school in an awkward silence.

* * *

**This is my first piece of writing so I'd love to know what you think :D I love reviews like I love sushi, and it will make me extremely happy if you leave me a line or two. :D Also, if you want to to be friends, you can always leave me a PM in my inbox anytime you want. I don't bite. Happy reading!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Unfortunately, the only thing I own is a mini pincher named Castro. Stephenie Meyer owns everything else.**

**As always, reviews would be lovely and helpful :3**

* * *

**EPOV**

_Beep. Beep. Beep._

"Five more minutes, mom…" I groaned, my face buried in my bed. The tangled sheets between my legs and soft-as-silk pillows beneath me felt too comfortable to leave. I needed five more minutes. Or ten. Maybe thirty.

_Beep. Beep. Beep._

Suddenly, a huge weight bounced down on the side of the mattress of my bed, completely waking me up. "Good morning princess, it's time to wake up." The familiar sound of Emmett's voice startled me, and I blinked three times, expecting my eyes to meet the ceiling, but instead, I was faced with my gorilla of a brother.

I sat up, very, very alert this time, almost hitting his head. "What time is it?" I asked. "And what—what the hell are you doing in my room?"

"Relax, princess. Your door was open. I was only grabbing a few of your cd's for next week's party. I'm making a mix."

Parties. What would Emmett do without them. We'd only moved in a few weeks ago and Emmett's already acquainted with some popular kids from Forks High, and the reservation.

"Anyway," Emmett continued, "it's a bit late. First day of a new life in a new school starts today, princess!"

"Please stop calling me that." I shook my head as I felt myself knowingly furrow my eyebrows.

Emmett got up from my bed carrying a mini-mountain of cd's, made it through the door (which was luckily already ajar for him), and was gone within seconds (fucking finally).

I groaned a most disdainful groan, and buried my face in one of the pillows again. A new life in a new school, in the middle of the semester. This was just what I needed. I groaned again. _Great._

My parents, Esme and Carlisle, thought it would be the most brilliant idea to move in to our hometown of Forks, Washington, all the way from Chicago in the middle of the year. "We all needed a new start", as they put it, and Carlisle had been offered a much higher position in the hospital in Forks. If I didn't know better, though, I would say my twin sister Alice used her cunning powers to convince my parents to move out due to her latest heartbreak.

_Sigh._

Although that said, I really didn't mind—I haven't been back in Forks for almost ten years, and it was good to know that it was still the same, apart from the few new houses constructed near the school, and apart from well, our new house of course. The air was still nice and cool, and the misty fog reminded me of how Alice, Emmett and I would play tag in the backyard back when we were little, all the while when my mom kept worrying that it would be raining really soon. And it usually did, here in Forks. But I guess that's just how I liked it.

"Everybody's gonna be late for school!" Alice cried out from the hallway. I could tell she was excited to start all over again, what with that asshole Riley did to her back in Chicago. I could almost hear her dancing around in the hall, her short, spiky hair bouncing about as she does.

_Oh, life._

I got up from my bed, took a quick shower, made it downstairs for yet another quick breakfast, and gave my parents a peck on the cheek goodbye, bagel in hand.

"We'll try to make today an okay day." I told myself as I make it to my car. Alice took the passenger seat, Emmett, his Jeep, and we're all off to Forks High for a new beginning.

**BPOV**

I tried to break the awkward silence between me and my brother. "How are things?" I smiled, unconsciously playing with the tips of my chestnut brown hair.

Jasper only but gave me a scoff. "I should be asking you the same question." He snapped, and I look away towards the greenery of Forks whizzing past by the window. It was starting to rain again, little drops of it falling on the car window. I tried to count how many of them start dropping. One, two, three. Seven. Eight. Soon, they're too much to count. As soon I become aware of what I was doing, I realized that I was avoiding his question.

Again, silence.

"We don't have to go to school today, Bells." He quickly said after another few minutes of an awkward atmosphere. "We could go to Port Angeles. I can take you shopping for some new Chuck Taylors. We could go watch a movie or something. We don't have to go to school if you don't want to, you know… if you don't feel like it."

I smiled at my brother's offer. He always, always goes along with whatever it is that makes me happy, even when we both know it isn't the right thing for either of us.

"That's tempting," I started. "But I'm going to have to face everyone at school one way or another. I might as well do it now." The thought made me a tad nauseous, and I think of all the worst possible scenarios in my head, all the people who'll be asking me how I am, how Michael's family is. I chewed on my nails until they start to bleed, the red of it coming out bit by bit out of my rough skin, and I felt a little better.

"Stop that!" Jasper quickly shouted as he slapped my hand away from my mouth.

"I can't help it. You know that." I answered back as quickly as he did, and I eyed him as he furrowed his brows in frustration while keeping his eyes on the road.

"Just… try not to. You took your meds last night?"

"Yeah," I nodded.

"Good."

As soon as we arrived at Forks High's parking lot, we both scrambled out of the car along with the other students and grab our backpacks. Jasper patted me on the head twice.

"If there's anything you need—" he started, firmly holding my shoulders with both his hands.

"…You're just a text away. Got it." I finished.

"Let me look at you," he smiled, although it was a sad smile. He eyed me from head to toe, checking to see if I was alright.

There were still bruises, scratches, and tiny little scars on both my hands from when I last tried to wash them vigorously, when I felt that things weren't okay. And every time that I felt that that wasn't working, I started to pick on my nails until they bled. It left little scars on my fingers as well, and Jasper didn't miss that whilst he checked up on me. The gray hoodie I was wearing covered most of the other scratches and the very small scars I inflicted upon myself, and I snickered in my head at the thought of wearing gloves to school daily, to cover up the rest of the scratches on my hands and nails.

He smiled again, tucking a piece of his dirty blonde hair behind his ear. "You're good."

"I'm good." I smiled back, and he patted me twice on the head again before he made it to the crowd, his face disappearing.

As I faced the sea of people that awaited me, I tried to hold back the nausea and the throbbing in my head. I slowly began to pick on my fingernails again, and although they've just stopped bleeding, they started a second time.

_Great._

"I need to do this," I told myself as I faced the crowd of students rushing to get to first period. "I need to do this." I told myself again, for good measure.

_One foot forward and another. That's it._

Before I knew it, my face disappeared in the crowd along with the other students', and I finally made it inside the school building.

But all eyes are staring at me.

_Wonderful._


	3. Chapter 3

**Again, Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight and all related characters. I merely play.**

* * *

**BPOV**

"Hey Bella, how are you doing?" Miss Lopez, my World Lit teacher asked. "How are Michael's parents?" She continued with a sad smile.

"I'm fine. And they're doing fine, thank you for asking." I tried to smile back at her but I feel like a ghost. I don't think I'll be able to elicit any kind of proper emotional response in a really long while. Or maybe ever.

_Who gives a damn._

I shuffled my way towards my usual desk next to Angela, one of my close friends. The orbs of her big, brown eyes shone from underneath her eyeglasses, and she gave me a nod, and a short "Welcome back." She knew me well enough to not ask any more questions, like everyone else did. And I liked that about her: no fuss.

People were staring at my direction again, and I couldn't help but feel another throbbing in my head. Unconsciously, I started to pick on my nails for the nth time, and from my periphery, I could see Angela squirm a bit next to me as she spotted the little drops of blood from my nail beds. I was extremely glad that she was nice enough to try and hide it, and I liked that, although I couldn't blame her for feeling disgust.

_I am such a freak without you, Michael._

I tried to hold back the tears and try with all my might to focus on Miss Lopez instead.

~o~

It was the seventh day, I counted. The seventh day I'd known you.

You grinned at me. "You can't drive?" you asked, and I nodded embarrassingly. I was a sophomore, and you were a sophomore, and soon I would learn to thank The Universe-whatever gods existed- that I was at least in one class with you.

"I can't drive. I take the bus going here. I ride at first station near Samson Street. And by doing this, I save myself a shit ton of gas money." I answered back defensively, casually tilting the chair I sitting on while beginning to chew on the not-so-epic, probably microwavable macaroni and cheese the cafeteria served. Angela and the others had spotted us from across the room and made their way to our table. They quickly took their seats at ease, but they were only smiling at us silently while wiggling their eyebrows at each other, listening to our conversation while they enjoyed their horrible-tasting macaroni and cheese.

Your pale forehead scrunched up at the sudden realization. "Hm, that's not a bad idea. I _would _save a hell lot of gas money if I just took the bus instead..." and you started to shove a spoonful of the horrid macaroni in your mouth as well.

I laughed. "See? It's not a bad idea, and I'm a genius."

It's only been a week since we've known each other and I already felt so comfortable with you. Why?

"Tell you what," you began. "From now on, I'll meet you at Samson Street every Wednesday. We have Wednesdays together, right? Mr. Banner, Biology?"

"Mm-hmm,"

"Well it's settled then! Welcome to the club, bus-buddy." You reached out your hand, gesturing for me to shake. I quickly shook it back in response, and Angela, Lauren, Tyler, Erik, and Mike laughed with us, seeming to catch up more on the conversation.

"It's settled." I chuckled.

Everything in my life was _perfect._

~o~

I stared at your empty seat at our usual cafeteria table for what seems like decades, playing with my food.

"Bella, you look like you haven't eaten in days," Mike Newton, another one of my friends, said. I never liked Mike at all that much, but this time, the look of concern on his face was undeniable. He lightly shoved my food tray near me, and looked at me with pleading eyes much like the others. "I know the cafeteria food is total shit, but you've got to at least eat something, you know."

I didn't look at him. Instead, I only looked at your empty seat. This time, I didn't hold back the tears. I let them fall, and they fell. They fell like the pouring rain outside the curtained cafeteria windows.

The table was quiet at my lack of response, and I continued to cry silently in the corner, biting my lower lip and trying to hold back the tears.

"Bella," Angela started, and I could feel that tears were starting to well up in her eyes as well. Her voice started to become heavy, and I could feel all of my friends' eyes staring at me.

And as if on cue, I felt a number of arms embracing me. As I looked to my right, one of my friends' face, I couldn't comprehend whose, was settled on my shoulder, and on the left was Angela, silently crying. It finally registered to me that my friends have all engulfed me in a tight hug, and I wanted none of it.

"Let me go," I mumbled under my breath. None of them heard me. Angela continued to cry, and I wanted to comfort her, but I was having none of this. I didn't want this.

_"I SAID LET ME GO._" I shouted, loud enough for the entire cafeteria to hear. I didn't want pity. That was last thing I wanted. I'd had enough for today, and I wanted to shout. My vision became blurry, eyes filled with an unhealthy amount of tears, and in a second, my friends were at least 10 feet away from me, eyes wide, most of them, filled with tears that they were trying so hard to hold back.. And unknowingly leaving my belongings, I quickly stormed out of the room and ran frantically to the spot where Michael and I would stay at free hours. To our secret, happy spot, at the back building.

**EPOV**

"You signed us up for a _Marine Biology_ elective?!" I cried out, hands flailing in the air. "Alice_, why_?"

"I thought it would be fun!" My pixie of a twin sister smirked. "All I want is to see the local aquarium, Eddie. And from what I hear from the others, that's all we'll be doing."

_The "others." Of course she'd already made friends._

I remembered the aquarium vividly, as if my life depended on it. The blue linoleum on the floor, I always thought was pretty. But everything else… wasn't. I started to get flashbacks of when I tried to catch a few fishes with my bare hands in an open tank, back when I was five. Apparently they were baby Oscars, a kind of fish similar to Piranhas. They had teeth. The result wasn't pretty.

"The _aquarium_?" I retorted, coming back to reality.

"Yes, Edward, the aquarium. It'll be loads of fun!"

I flailed my hands in the air again. Any interaction with any animal that was wet and floppy was out of the question. "Alice, _I. Hate. Fish._" I leveled my left hand a few inches in front of her face, showing her the tiny scar that the Oscar bite had left me all those years before.

Alice only giggled. "Oops."

I sighed as I fumbled around in my backpack, looking for my schedule (First period: History. Sigh). I knew well that I should have picked my electives myself, but I wanted to give my twin sister the liberty of choosing for the both of us. It was a way of showing her I cared and wanted to bond like she did, or so I put it. How very wrong I was. If this damned class gets me bitten by another Oscar, or worse, a fucking_ shark_… does Forks even have sharks in the aquarium? And what if whoever our teacher was going to be decided we would have to dissect, I don't know, a _trout _for finals?

God, I don't wanna know. Letting Alice pick that Marine Biology elective is probably going to be the biggest mistake of my life.

After first period's bell rang, I decided that I needed a smoke, and I needed one badly.

History didn't pan out so well as I'd been told at, very sternly, may I add, by Mr. Bins for accidentally falling asleep in class. I managed to see the short blonde that I sat next to laugh as she shook her head in feigned disappointment.

"You have the nerve, Mr. Cullen. And you're new, may I remind you. I'm not going to forget this." Mr Binns muttered under his breath, obviously frustrated. He proceeded to turn his back away from the class, and began scribbling down the rest of the day's lecture on the blackboard.

Right after the bell rang, I bolted out of my seat, and asked the nearest, douchiest-looking guy I could find where I could take a smoke. I didn't care at this point what reputation I might build in this school. I needed a drag, and I needed one now.

He looked at me with a weird look first, but he finally answered me. "Go to the back building." He said. "There's a spot there that none of the teachers know about."

Suddenly, he bit his lip a bit nervously, almost hesitant, but with a look of remorse in his eyes.

"That was… that was Michael's spot, though." He continued, and the look started to linger some more.

"Who the hell is Michael?" I asked, but before he could answer, the short blonde I sat next to quickly grabbed his arm.

"Come on Mike, we have to go see Bella for lunch." She said. And then they were gone.

_Huh._

I slumped my shoulders and made my way out of the room, and started to ask for directions as to where I could find this back building.

* * *

**Yes, they will be meeting soon. **

**As always, reviews would be a ton of help. :3**


	4. Chapter 4

**The song "The World is Our Playground and We Will Always Be Home" by Up Dharma Down, I feel fits perfectly in the scene where Edward lies down on the grass and falls asleep. Check it out on Youtube and you won't regret it! Up Dharma Down is one of my most favorite local bands and they're amazing. I used some of the lyrics on here, that Michael sings to Bella in her back building flashback. So please know that I didn't write these lyrics (although sometimes I wish I did. I crey).**

**Again, Stephenie Meyer owns everything and I only play with her characters.**

* * *

**EPOV**

I fumbled my way across the hallway, bumping into students who were in free period, unlike myself who was cutting classes. Staring at my red sneakers as I walked, I thought about how nice and convenient it was that Forks High had a system wherein students were given the liberty to choose not only their classes, but their free periods. Pretty convenient. I thought about Alice, who would be on her break now as well, if I could recall her schedule well enough. Knowing her like the back of my hand, she was probably sitting right now in one of the cafeteria tables cross-legged, the little pixie that she was, chattering to her new friends about her recent heartbreak from Chicago and all her little adventures.

I, on the other hand, the little rebellious non-pixie-like-my-sister that I am, am here, trying to make my way through the crowd, desperately trying to find this magical back building where I would soon take the most glorious drag that I've ever taken. I haven't smoked in days as I've been trying to hide this habit from my folks, and save for this morning when I woke up with a very fulfilling 8 hours, I haven't been getting any proper sleep since we moved in. Instead, I would spend my nights either re-reading one of my old, battered-up books or playing around with my guitar, while my siblings went around town during afternoons exploring and making friends with our neighbors and some kids over at the reservation. Alice and Emmett invited me to the beach at least twice, but I'd rejected. I don't like huge bodies of water and they make me feel uncomfortable.

I could spot a very small, beige-colored wooden door at the right, near the end of the hallway. According to the directions I'd asked from a wide-eyed girl wearing the most floral dress I've ever seen, the back building was straight ahead after I go through the beige door, across the football field, and past the library building, and directly right after the abandoned Science and Technology Complex. So. Fucking. Far. No wonder none of the teachers bother to check if any students make-out there, or take a smoke like I was about to. I didn't expect Forks High to be so fucking huge, but knowing that this was the only school in miles, at the same time, I wasn't surprised.

As soon as I made it out of the door (which seemed jammed, at first) and across all obstacles that hindered me from getting towards my destination, I tried to find a comfty spot against the bricked wall of the infamous back building(that was extremely old and sort-of creaking, if I didn't know better). It was covered in a few posters that invited the reader to various places ranging from concerts to bake sales. The grass was a bit long and untrimmed, and as I finally take out my pack of cigarettes and begin to light it against my mouth, I decided that I liked this place and that I would spend some of my free periods here from now on, away from everyone else. Some alone time never hurt anybody, right?

I take what I thought was the most glorious drag I've taken in my life, and I sit on the grass. "The world is my ashtray." I say to myself as I look up to see the gray sky. I wouldn't care less if it started to drizzle—like I said, I liked the rain. After I've finished two sticks, I lie down on the untrimmed grass, both hands behind my back, and set an alarm to around 30 minutes. Before I know it, I am asleep.

**BPOV**

I taste the salt of my tears as they stream down my face. The people in the hallway seem like such a blur now, and I can barely see anything except for the familiar beige door that lead to me and Michael's building.

_How dare they touch me like that, and how dare they make me feel so vulnerable_. I tell myself whilst remembering how my friends had tried to give me comfort back in the cafeteria. _They have no idea what I'm going through. They don't feel what I felt. What I feel. They didn't love him like I did. How dare they touch me like that._

I try to twist the knob of the wooden beige door, but it was stuck again, and frantically I kick the it in frustration as I let out a long huff. It always does this, but at certain times, when Michael and I were lucky, it didn't. I could feel people staring from behind me but I couldn't care less.

I was able to swing open the door, finally.

~o~

It was around the fourth month I knew you.

The first time you took me to our back building, our safe place, I was scared. We'd cut Mr. Banner's early Wednesday Biology class, and we told ourselves we would just make up for the missed classes next Friday, and on Monday. It was the first time I'd ever cut a class.

As we scurried, running across the football field and towards the back building itself, I look at you again, your black hair bouncing about and your almond eyes glancing at me from time to time to see if I could still catch up with your speed. You had one of your guitars with you and you carried it as if it were light as a feather as we ran, and ran, and ran. When I couldn't catch up any longer, you held out your hand, gesturing for me to take it.

When we got to the building, you sang to me, strumming your guitar with such gusto and ease. The morning had just begun, and I could see the sun as it shone brightly, drowning the both of us in its light.

"_You're my sunshine, my occasional rain…" _you began, looking at me with a smile, gesturing for me to continue. And I try, trying to remember the lyrics. I began to play with the grass against my palms, and finally let my shaky, rough voice sing to you.

"_Remember what I said? Nothing has to end..."_

And suddenly, you lock me in an embrace so tight after that, the first of our many embraces.

"What?" I laughed. "I didn't sing it right?"

"I'm so glad I met you Isabella Swan." You say, your face against my hair. I prayed to whatever gods might be that it smelled of my strawberry shampoo today.

You try to look at me, but my face is still locked in your embrace, against your chest. "Bella?" You call my name. I loved it when you call my name. Your voice always sounded like velvet.

"I don't want this to end. This doesn't have to end, does it?"

I smile. "I'm glad to have met you too, Michael McConnell. And no, it doesn't."

How very wrong you and I both would be.

~o~

All of our memories flashing through my eyes, I run across the football field, half-expecting Michael to show up from under the bleachers with one of his guitars in hand, gesturing me to follow him. But I knew better. I quickly erase this thought from my mind as my eyes well up in tears once more for the umpteenth time. "Fuck you, Michael McConnell." I mutter under my breath, almost regretting the love that we shared. "Fuck you for doing this to me." If it was going to hurt this much, at this moment I feel like I should have never loved at all.

Past the library and the old Science and Technology Complex, I walk slowly, panting. I could never keep up with Michael's walking as he was always very fast, much less his running. And while I tried to run as quick as he did, away from the cafeteria table where my friends sat in horror as I shunned them away, I imagine Michael once more, his back against our building, his red sneakers settled upon the soil and the grass.

Wait.

His red sneakers settled upon the soil and the grass.

My heart started to thump loudly in my chest, I could almost hear it. I was sure, so sure, that I had just seen Michael's red sneakers comfortably situated upon the green, untrimmed grass. Thump, thump, thump. My heart went.

"Michael?" I called out, hoping, a grin on my face ear to ear.

Suddenly, scenarios begin to fill my head in a flash. Michael McConnell was here, behind our back building, hiding all this time. He had probably decided to play some sort of practical joke on me and pretended he was dead. I would be angry at him, slap him across his face, but I would cry against his soft chest. And I would just be glad that he was around again. I would be so glad, I could die as well.

"Michael?" I call again.

"_Who?" _A sleepy voice groaned in reply.

Fuck.

This was certainly not Michael's voice.

This voice was not velvet, but almost as rough and sleepy as mine. And although I could feel a hint of comfort in this voice, I felt a pang against my chest as well. I was angry. This was not Michael. The Universe had decided to play a dirty trick on me, gave me hope. Hope that Michael was alive again, waiting for me all this time behind the back building. I cursed the gods. I let my guard down enough to hope again. I scurry over to get a closer view of the intruder.

What I prayed to be black hair and almond eyes were instead replaced by blinking, emerald green ones, pale skin, and messy bronze hair. The boy before me, if you could call him that, must have been at least six feet tall, and was wearing the same shoes as Michael always had. His black jeans were worn out, and he wore a simple white shirt and a yellow ochre flannel jacket over it. He was lying on me and Michael's spot, squinting against the sky.

And I was angrier than ever. This boy was not Michael, and he was in our safe place. Our happy place.

"_Who the fuck are you?" _I cry out_._

* * *

Next chapter coming up soon. I promise to try and make them longer from here on out, or at least as long as the last two ones. :3

Thank you for all the PM's and feedback I've been getting! It means a whole lot. If you have anything to say about my story, or just want to be friends, or even just talk, feel free to leave a PM in my inbox and I promise to get back to you! :D


	5. Chapter 5

**The song "The World is Our Playground and We Will Always Be Home" by Up Dharma Down, I feel fits perfectly in the scene where Edward lies down on the grass and falls asleep. Check it out on Youtube and you won't regret it! Up Dharma Down is one of my most favorite local bands and they're amazing. I used some of the lyrics on here, that Michael sings to Bella in her back building flashback. So please know that I didn't write these lyrics (although sometimes I wish I did. I crey).**

**Again, Stephenie Meyer owns everything and I only play with her characters.**

* * *

**EPOV**

I fumbled my way across the hallway, bumping into students who were in free period, unlike myself who was cutting classes. Staring at my red sneakers as I walked, I thought about how nice and convenient it was that Forks High had a system wherein students were given the liberty to choose not only their classes, but their free periods. Pretty convenient. I thought about Alice, who would be on her break now as well, if I could recall her schedule well enough. Knowing her like the back of my hand, she was probably sitting right now in one of the cafeteria tables cross-legged, the little pixie that she was, chattering to her new friends about her recent heartbreak from Chicago and all her little adventures.

I, on the other hand, the little rebellious non-pixie-like-my-sister that I am, am here, trying to make my way through the crowd, desperately trying to find this magical back building where I would soon take the most glorious drag that I've ever taken. I haven't smoked in days as I've been trying to hide this habit from my folks, and save for this morning when I woke up with a very fulfilling 8 hours, I haven't been getting any proper sleep since we moved in. Instead, I would spend my nights either re-reading one of my old, battered-up books or playing around with my guitar, while my siblings went around town during afternoons exploring and making friends with our neighbors and some kids over at the reservation. Alice and Emmett invited me to the beach at least twice, but I'd rejected. I don't like huge bodies of water and they make me feel uncomfortable.

I could spot a very small, beige-colored wooden door at the right, near the end of the hallway. According to the directions I'd asked from a wide-eyed girl wearing the most floral dress I've ever seen, the back building was straight ahead after I go through the beige door, across the football field, and past the library building, and directly right after the abandoned Science and Technology Complex. So. Fucking. Far. No wonder none of the teachers bother to check if any students make-out there, or take a smoke like I was about to. I didn't expect Forks High to be so fucking huge, but knowing that this was the only school in miles, at the same time, I wasn't surprised.

As soon as I made it out of the door (which seemed jammed, at first) and across all obstacles that hindered me from getting towards my destination, I tried to find a comfty spot against the bricked wall of the infamous back building(that was extremely old and sort-of creaking, if I didn't know better). It was covered in a few posters that invited the reader to various places ranging from concerts to bake sales. The grass was a bit long and untrimmed, and as I finally take out my pack of cigarettes and begin to light it against my mouth, I decided that I liked this place and that I would spend some of my free periods here from now on, away from everyone else. Some alone time never hurt anybody, right?

I take what I thought was the most glorious drag I've taken in my life, and I sit on the grass. "The world is my ashtray." I said to myself as I looked up to see the gray sky. I wouldn't care less if it started to drizzle—like I said, I liked the rain. After I've finished two sticks, I laid myself down on the untrimmed grass, both hands behind my back, and set an alarm to around 30 minutes. Before I knew it, I was asleep.

**BPOV**

I tasted the salt of my tears as they streamed down my face. The people in the hallway seemed like such a blur now, and I could barely see anything except for the familiar beige door that led to me and Michael's building.

_How dare they touch me like that, and how dare they make me feel so vulnerable_. I told myself whilst remembering how my friends had tried to give me comfort back in the cafeteria. _They have no idea what I'm going through. They don't feel what I felt. What I feel. They didn't love him like I did. How dare they touch me like that._

I tried to twist the knob of the wooden beige door, but it was stuck again, and frantically I kicked the it in frustration as I let out a long huff. It always does this, but at certain times, when Michael and I were lucky, it didn't. I could feel people staring from behind me but I couldn't care less.

I was able to swing open the door, finally.

~o~

It was around the fourth month I knew you.

The first time you took me to our back building, our safe place, I was scared. We'd cut Mr. Banner's early Wednesday Biology class, and we told ourselves we would just make up for the missed classes next Friday, and on Monday. It was the first time I'd ever cut a class.

As we scurried, running across the football field and towards the back building itself, I look at you again, your black hair bouncing about and your almond eyes glancing at me from time to time to see if I could still catch up with your speed. You had one of your guitars with you and you carried it as if it were light as a feather as we ran, and ran, and ran. When I couldn't catch up any longer, you held out your hand, gesturing for me to take it.

When we got to the building, you sang to me, strumming your guitar with such gusto and ease. The morning had just begun, and I could see the sun as it shone brightly, drowning the both of us in its light.

"_You're my sunshine, my occasional rain…" _you began, looking at me with a smile, gesturing for me to continue. And I try, trying to remember the lyrics. I began to play with the grass against my palms, and finally let my shaky, rough voice sing to you.

"_Remember what I said? Nothing has to end..."_

And suddenly, you lock me in an embrace so tight after that, the first of our many embraces.

"What?" I laughed. "I didn't sing it right?"

"I'm so glad I met you Isabella Swan." You say, your face against my hair. I prayed to whatever gods might be that it smelled of my strawberry shampoo today.

You try to look at me, but my face is still locked in your embrace, against your chest. "Bella?" You call my name. I loved it when you call my name. Your voice always sounded like velvet.

"I don't want this to end. This doesn't have to end, does it?"

I smile. "I'm glad to have met you too, Michael McConnell. And no, it doesn't."

How very wrong you and I both would be.

~o~

All of our memories flashing through my eyes, I ran further across the football field, half-expecting Michael to show up from under the bleachers with one of his guitars in hand, gesturing me to follow him. But I knew better. I quickly erased the thought from my mind as my eyes welled up in tears once more for the umpteenth time. "Fuck you, Michael McConnell." I muttered under my breath, almost regretting the love that we shared. "Fuck you for doing this to me." If it was going to hurt this much, at that moment I feel like I should have never loved at all.

Past the library and the old Science and Technology Complex, I walk slowly, panting. I was never able to keep up with Michael's walking as he was always very fast, much less his running. And while I tried to run as quick as he did, away from the cafeteria table where my friends sat in horror as I shunned them away, I imagined Michael once more, his back against our building, his red sneakers settled upon the soil and the grass.

Wait.

His red sneakers settled upon the soil and the grass.

My heart started to thump loudly in my chest, I could almost hear it. I was sure, so sure, that I had just seen Michael's red sneakers comfortably situated upon the green, untrimmed grass. Thump, thump, thump. My heart went.

"Michael?" I called out, hoping, a grin on my face ear to ear.

Suddenly, scenarios begin to fill my head in a flash. Michael McConnell was here, behind our back building, hiding all this time. He had probably decided to play some sort of practical joke on me and pretended he was dead. I would be angry at him, slap him across his face, but I would cry against his soft chest. And I would just be glad that he was around again. I would be so glad, I could die as well.

"Michael?" I called again.

"_Who?" _A sleepy voice groaned in reply.

Fuck.

This was certainly not Michael's voice.

This voice was not the same velvet that Michael's had, and it was almost as rough and sleepy as mine. And although I could feel a hint of comfort in this voice, I felt a pang against my chest as well. I was angry. This was not Michael. The Universe had decided to play a dirty trick on me, gave me hope. Hope that Michael was alive again, waiting for me all this time behind the back building. I cursed the gods. I let my guard down enough to hope again. I scurried over to get a closer view of the intruder.

What I prayed to be black hair and almond eyes were instead replaced by blinking, emerald green ones, pale skin, and messy bronze hair. The boy before me, if you could call him that, must have been at least six feet tall, and was wearing the same shoes as Michael always had. His black jeans were worn out, and he wore a simple white shirt and a yellow ochre flannel jacket over it. He was lying on me and Michael's spot, squinting against the sky.

And I was angrier than ever. This boy was not Michael, and he was in our safe place. Our happy place.

"_Who the fuck are you?" _I cried out_._

* * *

Next chapter coming up soon.

Thank you for all the PM's and feedback I've been getting! It means a whole lot. If you have anything to say about my story, or just want to be friends, or even just talk, feel free to leave a PM in my inbox and I promise to get back to you! :D


	6. Chapter 6

**This chapter will only be in EPOV. **

**Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight and all related characters.**

* * *

**EPOV**

"Who the fuck are you?" she stammered. I blinked my eyes open three times, unaware of what was happening. Quickly, I tried to gather my thoughts and began to piece everything together—wanted a drag, back building, fell asleep—I blinked my eyes a second time, and they were met with chestnut brown hair, skin almost as pale as mine, and deep, dark eyebags. This girl looked like she hadn't eaten or slept in days, but she was beautiful nonetheless. Her cheeks had a tiny tint of rose in them, and I could get a whiff of her strawberry scent as the wind blew it across my face. She was wearing worn-out Doc Martens, black leggings, and a hoodie that I felt belonged to someone three times her size. Her hands looked a bit sore, almost as if they were bleeding earlier this morning.

I sat up.

"I'm uh… I was just leaving." I started, not wanting to cause any trouble with this girl. And then I suddenly remembered the guy I asked about the back building in the first place. "This was Michael's spot," he said. I assumed Michael was a guy, but in front of me trying to claim her territory was a girl, broken yet lovely. Unless it was possible that _she _was Michael? Are some parents weird enough to cross-gender their kids' names like that?

She was so tiny and fragile but she pushed my chest, hard enough for me to back away a few steps.

"You think you can just go here and—and—" she started to shout. My eyebrows furrowed in confusion. Obviously this girl was upset, and her puffy red eyes began to water. I feel as though she's been crying the whole day.

I let out a scoff. "You're not Michael are you?" I asked, stupidly, still feeling as if I was half asleep. I was almost sure this Michael guy that the dude earlier was talking about was well, a guy and not this girl standing in front of me, but I asked for good measure anyway.

She stares at me, her brown eyes wide with anger.

"_Get the fuck out."_ She stammered.

"What?" This felt weird and a tad too surreal. If she was so upset that I'd crossed some sort of sacred territory, she didn't have to be so fucking rude about it.

"This isn't your place. It's ours. Now get the fuck out." She said, louder this time.

Mockingly, I started a snide reply. "Well I'm sorry, Miss Michael or whatever the hell your name is, but I don't see your name anywhere on this sacred land."

Out of nowhere, she grabbed my wrist with a force so strong that it was hardly believable for me to register that this strength was coming from such a small, damaged girl. She led me to the brick wall of the back building, tore apart one of the bake sale posters, and pushed me toward the spot where it used to be. I could clearly make out words that were scribbled on the wall in blue ink:

"_**This world is our playground, and we will always be home.**_

_**Bella Swan & Michael McConnell**_

_**Experts in the Field of Kick-Assery**_

_**05/08/12"**_

I let out another scoff. So you and your boyfriend carved your names or whatever on a brick wall, big deal." I rolled my eyes at her. I couldn't register myself why I was being this mean to her, but it just irked me so much that she had to push me around and tell me what to do. I just woke up, my day already started badly, and I didn't need any of this.

Her eyes widened again, and she pushed me for what seemed like the zillionth time.

"Fuck you. Get out." She cried, tears flowing to her rosy, red cheeks.

I sighed. I didn't want to see her cry, and I felt like she suffered enough damage for today.

"Look, I'm sorry." I began. "It's just that- I had a really bad day today, and you kind of… well, let's just say you put the cake on the icing perfectly."

There was a long silence as she just stared at me, tears still welling up in her eyes.

"I'm Edward. Edward Cullen." I said, awkwardly, as I reached out my hand and gestured for to shake it, although I didn't expect her to.

And I was right. She didn't. "You know what," I started. "No I'm not. I'm not Edward Cullen. I'm… I'm leaving. I'm sorry I took over you and your boyfriend's spot. I'll be on my way to third period now." I turned around and started walking back towards the football field, but from my periphery, I could see her collapse on the floor, her knees against the grass, and her hands in her face.

"Nice work, asshole." I mumbled to myself, shaking my head. I felt like the biggest jerk in the world, and now I didn't have a single spot in the entire school to let out this frustration at myself, or even take a drag at.

The next day morning was a complete blur. I couldn't sleep the night I met the chestnut-haired girl at the back building, and every time I tried to close my eyes her rose-tinted cheeks and swollen hands haunted me. Her words rang in my ears.

"_This isn't your place, it's ours. Now get the fuck out."_

"Well, Jesus," I said to myself softly in the dead of night. "I'm sorry if I upset you so much, you know, but why couldn't you just put a goddamned fence around your sacred spot if it was so special to you and your little boyfriend?"

I tossed and turned around the bed, my sheets a mess on top of my legs. I check my alarm clock, the only source of light as of now in my entire room: 3:19 am. And I had to get up at 7 tomorrow. That left me with around 4 hours, if I get to sleep now.

Sigh.

I closed my eyes tightly and tried to think about my childhood here in Forks. Most of the few friends I had had already moved to different states, and we'd lost touch along the years. But nonetheless, I tried to think about them and our childhood together, running around my backyard with Emmett and Alice. There was a girl I used to like in the neighborhood, Irina, and she had long blonde hair and pretty blue eyes. We were 5. I tried to give her flowers when I'd decided that I liked her but she rejected me, saying that James, another one of our playmates, was "already her boyfriend".

Ugh.

Focus on other memories, Edward.

My mind wandered off to the time when I had to break up with my highschool sweetheart-of-sorts, Jessica Stanley, back in Chicago. We were freshmen. It wasn't working out, and she wanted more from me than just my looks. I was 15, awkward, and scared, and she, 16, popular, and I was half-sure her boobs were already made out of silicon.

"Irina and Jessica were nothing like that chestnut-haired girl," I mumbled to myself. Suddenly I saw an image of me and the same girl who'd told me so blatantly to "get the fuck out". I imagined us meeting under normal circumstances, in one of my classes. I was bound to come across her some other way, eventually. Sure, Forks High was a huge school, physically speaking, but for some reason I felt like it was such a tight-knit school where everyone knew everyone else. In my daydream, the bell rings, we're through introducing ourselves, and class is over. The chestnut-haired girl stood up from her seat, and her hair waves away as her hand does, giving me a quick goodbye.

Then I remembered her strawberry scent.

God, it smelled so delicious.

Another image of the same girl, whom I decided must be Bella, came to mind again. We were eating at the cafeteria, and she's healthy, and lively, without dark circles under her eyes. She's laughing with Alice and Emmett, and I'm watching them exchange conversation as I played around sheepishly with my cafeteria food.

"We should've met under normal circumstances," I thought to myself, sleepily, yawning.

My eyes began to close and I drift off to sleep, dreaming about Bella's chestnut hair, rose-tinted cheeks, and her strawberry scent.

* * *

**What do you think?**

**PS Forgot to mention that the phrase "The world is our playground and we will always be home" is actually the title of one of my favorite songs from one of my favorite bands, Up Dharma Down. Their sound is great, and you could check them out on YouTube if it tickles your fancy.**


	7. Chapter 7

**This one will be a bit short, but I'm posting the next chapter up soon so be ready!**

**Stephenie Meyer owns everything and I only play.**

* * *

**EPOV**

I quickly scrambled to the seat next to the boy called Mike, the douchey-looking guy, not wanting to be seen by Bella. I'd hurt her, although not physically, yesterday. But I did, I hurt her, and I hurt her in one of the worst ways possible.

I watched her as she made her way next to Angela's seat and I cursed myself for not thinking of wearing a hoodie to school today to cover my stupid face for Bella not to see. I thought of an idea, quick, and although I didn't think it would help, it was worth a shot.

"Uhm hey… Mike, right? I'm Edward Cullen. Would you mind if we switched seats?"

"Hi Edward. Mike Newton. Why, though?" he asked, raising an eyebrow.

I said the first thing that came to mind. "Just… I, uh—I like the view, okay?" I scratched my head for what seemed like the thousandth time today. I know I didn't sound convincing, but thankfully, Mike didn't ask any more questions and scurried over to make some room for me. I quickly took his seat, crossing my arms, slouching, and looking out the window. My periphery told me that Bella was just about to take her seat too, next to Angela. I tried to hide my head again by pretending to look somewhere far out the window.

Bella and Angela said quick hellos, and I could hear Angela ask her how she was. I couldn't hear anything as Bella was mumbling her way throughout the entire conversation.

"Oh, I almost forgot!" Angela cried, and I prayed to God she wouldn't do what I thought she was just about to do. "Over there's my new friend, Edward, next to Mike." I could feel Mike wave his hand like an idiot, and in response to Angela's indirect request to introduce myself, I did the quickest, smartest thing I could think of: I pretend to be asleep. I lolled my head to the side, and tried to awkwardly face the window while I pretend-closed my eyes.

"Err," I heard Mike say. "I think he fell asleep. That's kind of dumb. We exchanged seats only 'cause he said he liked the view."

Bella said something under her breath, and I could only but make out the words "know" and "him".

"That's great!" Angela exclaimed. "He's a pretty nice guy, don't you think?"

"He's super." Bella replied, I would guess sarcastically, almost a whisper. If I didn't know better, I would say that she just rolled her eyes. Angela didn't seem to notice, though, and they soon begin to talk about other things, although Bella only snickers softly and Angela did most of the talking. I spent the rest of the ride to the pretending to be asleep, hoping that Bella wasn't gazing at me throughout the ride.

The weekend came along swiftly. Emmett had thrown a party with his new friends at a small place he rented at Port Angeles, and Alice kept going to my room rambling on and on about Friday, when this dirty-blonde senior (Janssen, Jonathan- his name was J _something_, I forgot) talked to her in the cafeteria and "unknowingly swept her off her feet". It was a bit unlike her to have moved on so quickly after her second heartbreak, the one with Riley in Chicago, but in all honesty, I was just glad she was happy here in Forks. She'd made so many friends already, and her quiz scores the past few days have been extremely high they could touch the top of our three-storey house.

I wish I could say the same for myself, though.

The aquarium last Thursday was horrible, and Dr. Rohan had asked me a question to check up if I'd been listening. I haven't, as I'd only been staring unconsciously at Bella and her chestnut-brown hair the entire day, all the while trying to avoid her and her gaze. Apparently Dr. Rohan only asked me an extremely easy question according to Alice and her friend, and I mentally punched myself in the face for doing so poorly in school recently. I could usually do a whole lot better than this in Chicago.

Apart from Angela, I'd made absolutely zero friends this week. This was strange, because I usually get along with most of the guys in school back in Chicago. We would talk about the most shallow things—cars, video games, girls, and more video games—and before I knew it, the day would be over, and the only thing we'd have talked about was that. Cars and girls. And video games. However, there was this one guy I'd been able to talk to about shit that was a little deeper than girls and video games. His name was Claude Debussy, and I kept an old poster of him up my wall in my room back in Chicago. Ha-ha. And apart from that one poster I would talk to alone in my room on occasion, almost every guy I'd talk to, we'd talk about, well, girls, videogames and cars. Except basketball. I fucking hated basketball and I'd shun away when the topic came around.

I didn't wanna be friends with Mike, because he seemed like a douche, and it was really rarely I would judge someone at first glance like that, but I had a bad feeling about Mike, and I trusted my gut for once. The rest of Bella's guy friends seemed nice, like Tyler Crowley, but these were _Bella's_ friends, and I deemed them territory that I would never step foot on.

Monday came by, and I had history in the morning again. This time I proved myself worthy by answering around three to four questions right from Mr. Binns. He was impressed, and gave me a curt nod, along with another, "I'm not going to forget this Mr. Cullen," but smiling this time. I wanted to beam at myself. The short blonde I sat next to gave me a wink, but I chose to ignore her. She just didn't appeal to me.

And as I couldn't go to the back building to take a celebratory drag, I decided I would sit next to Alice and Emmett for lunch.

Only I couldn't.

Because when I entered the cafeteria hall and I was able to spot the two of them, they were sitting next to Bella.

* * *

**Hope you guys like it! Next chapter will be in BPOV. :D**


	8. Chapter 8

**PLEASE READ: Hello everyone! Felt like I needed to tell you guys that the events that take place here, in Bella's POV, start right after she and Edward met at the back building, not the next Monday where she and Edward meet again at the cafeteria where we last left off in Edward's POV. We'll get there in a bit, though. For now, happy reading!**

* * *

**BPOV**

_**Wednesday**_

I think I'd overslept.

I blinked my eyes open to be met with my room's ceiling, the paper cranes that Michael and I had made for decoration dwindling above. My vision was still a bit blurry but I could make out the oranges, pinks, and yellows of the cranes that were attached to thin strings, taped tightly to secure them. Everywhere I looked, there seemed to be traces of Michael's love, and I didn't know what to do.

I was tired of crying, and so I let out a deep breath, and sat up. I tried to remember yesterday's events. For starters, I met a boy in place of Michael that I had never seen before in school, when I tried to find some solace in our spot in the back building. I remembered his eyes—they were so, so green, like emeralds, and they were beautiful. A pack of cigarettes in hand, his bronze hair was everywhere, and he wore a flannel jacket over his white shirt that gave him a sort of Kurt Cobain vibe. But he _insulted_ Michael. He insulted his memory. "So you and your boyfriend carved your names or whatever in a brick wall, big deal" he scoffed. What a douchebag. Everyone knew what happened to Michael in school, and I assumed that he had as well. So how dare he? How dare he insult Michael's memory like that? All because he wanted to take a stupid drag in me and Michael's spot. The nerve.

Maybe I was overreacting, but he shouldn't have acted like such a fucking douche. I could feel my toes curl up in anger towards the boy with the green eyes. Edward Cullen, or whatever the hell his name was. He didn't have the right to say the things that he said, no matter what actions I may have shown him.

I quickly buried the memory away and tried to remember what else had happened yesterday, and quietly, I gasped as I remembered how I shunned my friends away when they tried their best to comfort me, and I suddenly felt like a jerk. I quickly grabbed my new phone on the side table and sent Angela and the others individual messages of apologies, and my phone started blinking like mad as I received replies from them almost instantly. I didn't want to lengthen the conversation because I felt like shit again, and I might have ended up saying or doing something I'd regret later on, but three of Angela's texts came in like wildfire that I couldn't ignore them.

"_Bella, where are you? Marine Biology today. We're boarding the bus."_

"_Hey. Dr. Rohan called the first roll already, I told her you'd be coming in soon. Are you?"_

"_Bella, I'm worrying here. Tell me you're not up to something stupid again, okay? Go. To. Class."_

I sighed as I touched the screen of my phone to type in a quick reply.

"_Not feeling so well today, Anj. So not going. But please have fun at the aquarium. I know you guys have been psyched to go since forever."_ I hit the send button. Judging from how the sun spilled its light across my room, it was probably too late to be going to class.

"_Okay then. See you in school, alright Bella? Take care."_ Angela replied.

I checked the clock: 7:30 am. Class would be starting in thirty minutes. I wondered if Jasper had already left.

As if on cue, two quick knocks on my door surfaced. It was Jasper.

"Bells, I've been knocking the whole morning. Are you hitching a ride, or not?"

"I'm—no thanks, I think I'll be going to school on my own today," I lied. Just thinking about going to Marine Biology made me nauseous again, and I started picking on my nails. Michael and I were supposed to take this elective together. Poseidonology, he called it. How adorable. If only…

Silent drops of tears suddenly fell from my face. I wiped them away swiftly.

"Are you sure? Bella, you only learned how to drive like, what, a week ago?" Jasper began, distracting me from my thoughts. "I don't want you doing anything reckless with that new car of yours."

"I'm taking the bus," I suddenly blurted out, not thinking.

And I thought of Michael again. If I took the bus today, that would be the first time since the accident that I would be taking it without him.

I could sense Jasper on the other side of the door fall silent again. He, like the other friends we shared, knew that Michael had been taking the bus with me to school almost daily. Not until—

Tears.

"God-fucking-dammit, Bella. Please stop crying." I said as I slapped myself across the face, loud enough for Jasper to hear at the other end of the door. He suddenly bolted in, in lightning speed, his footsteps loud against the flooring.

"Jesus, Bella, what the fuck was that?" he said, sitting on the bed next to me and locking me in a tight embrace. If I could deem myself lucky in spite of everything that's happened to me recently, I would say I was one of the luckiest people in the world for having a big brother like Jasper.

"I slapped myself," I laughed lightly against his shoulder.

He sighed. "Don't do that, okay? Just… I know you feel like you have to do these things because of…" he hesitated for a bit before continuing, and I gave him a short look that told him it was okay. "…Because of well, what you have. I know it's hard, but your therapist told you to at least try, didn't she?"

Dr. Siobhan Glover, my therapist, did tell me I was getting a bit better before Michael had passed, and that if I could, I could try and stop my compulsions on occasion.

"She did," I replied, looking remorseful. "I'm sorry," I said, and wiped the tears away from my face on my own.

"Are you sure you're going to take the bus?" Jasper asked. "You could really just hitch a ride with me, you know. It wouldn't matter if I'm late_ with_ you. I don't want you driving yet, and I want you in school in one piece," he chuckled lightly.

"No," I started. "To be honest I—I didn't really feel like going. Please don't tell mom. Has she left?"

Jasper smiled, but it was a sad smile. "She left. But Bella… you've been out of school for a week. I know I offered that you and I both go to Port Angeles instead of class yesterday, but I've been thinking about you, and I don't want your grades slipping any more than they already are. And yes, I know. The principal talked to me and mom."

I began to think about it and eventually gave in. He was right. My grades _have_ been slipping, and if I skipped class today, they would slip even further.

"Okay. I'll get myself ready. Give me five minutes." I said.

It usually doesn't take me long to get ready in these kinds of rush situations. A 5-minute shower, 2-minute toothbrush, and a palm full of strawberry body butter later, Jasper and I make our way to our garage and into our—or rather his- SUV. Seatbelts on, he backs up the car, we make our way to school, and I pray to God that the bus going to the aquarium hasn't left me yet. I wouldn't want Jasper to drive me all the way there; I would decline his offer if he gave it, but knowing him, I wouldn't have a choice but to let him take me to the aquarium anyway, if I didn't catch the bus.

At last, after what seemed like a stretch of eternity, we made it to the school's parking lot, where the bus was situated near the school's main entrance. Jasper made a run for it, rushing to class, as did I towards the bus. When I got there, I could hear Dr. Rohan's distinct megaphone voice: "Alright, everyone here? Final roll call first before we depart, shall I?"

"Wait!" I shouted from below the bus, gasping for air. I wasn't much of a runner, and I would almost always start hyperventilating whenever I ran too much.

"Miss Swan," Dr. Rohan smiled, a most sincere smile. "I'm very glad you could join us. Please take a seat."

As I walk along the middle of the bus, I tried my best to find an empty seat, but almost all of them were occupied. I didn't want to sit next to Mike—he was a part of our circle of friends, yes, but I didn't really like him that much. There's always someone in the group of friends that you don't like very much, especially if you're in a large group like ours.

"Bella?" Angela called, and I spotted her sitting next to—

Oh, God.

Please don't tell me she was sitting next to who I think she was.

I heard her say something to who I suspected was the douchebag with green eyes that I met yesterday—yep, there was no doubt it was him, his messy bronze hair all over the place just like it was yesterday—and he quickly scurried over to sit next to Mike instead. Huh. I guess Angela had read my mind, knowing how much I wasn't that fond of Mike.

I made my way towards her and took the seat that the Cullen boy was previously on, and I tried to get a glimpse of him from across me—he was now looking out the window, his arms crossed, slouching like an idiot, obviously trying to avoid my gaze. I'm sure he was well aware of what he did yesterday, no doubt about it. He even tried to make an apology, which I did not take. I looked at Angela instead. The thought of the boy only infuriated me.

Angela began to ramble about her day yesterday, and how her mom tried to drag her to Port Angeles late last night in spite of it being a school night. She was talking as if everything was normal, like nothing happened. Like I said, I liked that about her: no fuss at all.

"Oh, I almost forgot!" Angela exclaimed in the middle of our little conversation. "Over there's my new friend, Edward, next to Mike."

Freaking _Edward_. I could almost feel hot air escape from my nostrils as I gave out a deep breath. I looked at him from across us. Mike was waving stupidly, but Edward was suddenly in a stiff position, asleep… or at least pretending to be. Mike apologized to us for him.

"Something wrong?" Angela asked me, looking a bit worried, but I smiled at her instead, trying to give away a sarcastic look. "Yeah. I know the guy. I know him." I fake-beamed.

Angela didn't catch my drift at all. "That's great!" She said. "He's a pretty nice guy, don't you think?"

"He's super," I said, glaring at him with narrow eyes. Angela didn't see.

We continued the rest of our conversation with Angela doing most of the talking. Edward was still in the same position that he was in, arms crossed, shoulders slouched, and stiff as a rock, pretending to be asleep throughout the whole ride. When he got to the aquarium, I tried my best to listen to Dr. Rohan, but I could feel Edward's gaze on me the entire time, so I ended up just staring at my shoes for the rest of the lecture on several species of fish that were imported from La Push, the reservation near our town. I jotted down notes on my head that I prayed I wouldn't forget. Maybe I could just copy some notes from Angela later on.

At least I'd be getting points for attendance, I told myself.

During lunch break (which we still spent in the aquarium), we were given free time to roam around the parts that weren't to be discussed on by Dr. Rohan. Another one of my friends, Erik, had asked me to join him, Angela, Mike, and the others whilst they explored the rest of the venue, but I politely declined. Edward was nowhere to be seen, thank God, and I guessed he was outside smoking. I took a spot on one of the benches in front of the tank that contained several species of jellyfish, and I let my mind forcefully wander on the rest of the aspects of my life that weren't related to Michael and how we were both supposed to be here as I'd been the one that signed both of us up for this class.

I thought about my mom, and how worried she must be for both me and Jasper. For one, she would have to worry about me, and as for Jasper, well, Renee would have to worry about Jasper worrying about me. Sigh. What with our dad, Charlie, on the other side of the country and newly divorced from my mom, Renee would have to juggle her priorities all by herself from now on. I was thankful that Jasper was around. He was close to my dad, but he had opted to stay behind because he chose to be with me over Charlie.

Out of nowhere, I suddenly felt another presence beside me on the bench, and a pair of fingers snapping before my eyes.

"Hi!" the voice beside me greeted, and I jerked my head to the right and I was met with a girl with short, spiky hair who was pale, but extremely beautiful. She reminded me of the little pixies in cartoons that I watched growing up, and she wore red ballet flats and a dress that looked completely inappropriate for Forks weather. She had Raybans tucked in the collar of her dress. I've never seen her before, and I guessed that she just moved in Forks High from some place else.

"I'm Alice! And your mind seems to be wandering off somewhere, I gather?" she smiled. It was only me and her in the entire room that contained the jellyfish, where Dr. Rohan had left us to explore.

"Bella," I said, shaking her hand. "Bella Swan." I liked the vibe and aura around this girl named Alice, and casually I decided right then and there that I liked her.

* * *

**Any Alice x Bella shippers out there? The friendship is about to unfold. Yayzers.**

**Sometimes I feel like this story is going to fast, though. Please tell me if you agree and I'll do my best to write better for you guys. Cheers!**


	9. Chapter 9

**Thank you again for all the words of encouragement! They mean a lot. You guys make me want to keep writing. Lots of love from me.**

**Again, Stephenie Meyer owns all characters, and I only play.**

* * *

**BPOV**

This girl, named Alice, was now sitting right next to me, and for some reason that only The Universe knows, I was completely okay with it. I don't know if it was the sunny dress she was wearing that reminded me of my childhood in Phoenix, or her red ballet flats that made me feel as though I was in the Wizard of Oz,_ or_ the fact that she had just said hi to me so casually; that she didn't know anything about me and what I've gone and what I'm going through. I could have a fresh start with this nice girl. I decided that I liked Alice right then and there.

"You didn't feel like exploring, huh?" she began, beaming towards the tank of jellyfish in front of us.

"Not really… I usually like being in the aquarium but I suppose I just have a lot on my mind right now," I answered, feeling a bit fidgety this time. Slowly I began to pick on my reddish fingernails again, and I spotted Alice staring at me while I did. It made me feel a bit uncomfortable.

But all she did was beam at me again, her smile genuine, not like the others who would pretend to be okay with it when I knew deep down in their guts they probably wanted to barf.

"It's alright, that's nothing to be ashamed about." She said matter-of-factly. "I used to do that too, when I was a freshman. Had my first heartbreak. I wouldn't stop picking on my fingernails either until they were all sore and red. I guess it was just a phase since I've stopped ever since I got together with my second boyfriend."

I smiled. Someone like her went through what I was going through. I felt warm inside, like it was a cold December night and I was sitting in front of the fireplace, a warm blanket around me and some hot chocolate to sip. "You must be really happy with him," I said, looking at my shoes.

"Riley? Oh god, no. He turned out to be a total jerk. Cheated on me almost right in front of my face. It was a miracle my family moved us back here in Forks… I don't think I would've been able to stand seeing that asshole in school for another year."

"Moved back?" I asked, suddenly curious.

Alice fixed her dress, smiled, and seemed excited to tell me more about herself. I didn't mind at all, and in all honesty, I was so interested I felt like I was watching a telenovella. "Oh yeah, we used to live here, back when we were little kids, my brothers and I." she began. "Actually one of them is here. He's a little antisocial and he can be a total jerk sometimes, but I guarantee you he's really nice."

"He's here?" I gulped, and I felt my stomach dropped to my feet. Please tell me you aren't siblings with the person I think you're siblings with.

"Yeah, he's taking a smoke outside, I think. He doesn't smoke inside the house. Our dad's a doctor, and he'd have a heart attack if he ever found out about the smoking and drinking Edward does."

"Edward?" I felt myself choke on my own spit. "Your brother's Edward?"

"Yeah, we're twins! Is something wrong?" Alice asked, raising one eyebrow.

"Oh nothing, nothing at all." I lied. "I think I've seen him before around here. He does kind of look like you…"

Alice giggled. "You think so?"

How could such a douchebag like Edward be _twins _with one of the nicest girls I've ever met? I felt like The Universe was fucking my life up again. One of the few times I start off with someone on the right foot, she happens to be the _twin sister_ of one of my sworn enemies. I decided not to mind. Alice was not Edward, and Edward was not Alice, even if they were twins. And Alice had said that Edward was a bit antisocial… maybe that's why he was taking a drag alone in me and Michael's spot before. Maybe that means I didn't have to be friends with him even if I was now friends with Alice.

"Yeah, except for the hair. Yours is a bit darker…" I said, and I thought of something else to talk about, to change the subject. "I have a brother here, too, although he's a senior. He's a year older than me." Thank god I was able to think of a new topic quickly.

"Is he cute?" Alice joked, and I laughed. Jasper didn't look bad, definitely. But I couldn't be the one to judge since our relationship consisted of throwing baby food at each other when we were younger, teasing each other to no end, and at some point in my life, I'm pretty sure I got to wear his boxers to bed.

"I guess he is. You can't ask me that, though! I'm his sister," I laughed, and before I knew it Alice and I began to talk about the most random, silliest things, and the thought of Michael didn't even cross my mind at all.

It turns out Alice knew some of my friends, like Lauren, the short blonde I've been friends with since Freshman year. After lunch, I decided to leave the two of them together as I stood in a corner, notebook finally in hand. I started to jot down as much notes as I can, and although I could spot Edward at the back of the crowd, I decided not to mind him. Sure, he was a certified royal douchebag, but I liked his sister a lot, and on the scale of how much I hated Edward, he went down from a 10 to an 8.

The weekend swiftly passed as I unconsciously decided to clear my head of all thoughts about Michael. The moment I got home, I sent Alice a text (we exchanged numbers) and asked her if she wanted to go to Port Angeles on Saturday with me and Angela. She said yes immediately, and if I didn't know any better I could have sworn I heard her squeak while she sent me a reply back, confirming the trip. _"PLEASE! :D"_ she said in text, all capital letters. When Alice came over to pick me up in Emmett, her other brother's jeep on Saturday, she blushed at the sight of Jasper and told me about their encounter at the cafeteria the other day. There was only one plate of salad and chicken left at the counter, and they both wanted it. Unknowingly their hands brushed against each other, and they both flushed a most red color. When left alone with Jasper when Alice went to the bathroom to check up on herself, he confirmed the story; he did indeed feel himself blush as his hand touched Alice's, and he commented on how cute he thought she was.

After we picked up Angela, we made it to Port Angeles in Alice's car in a jiffy. At one of the stores called Gabrielle's, Alice and Angela bonded immediately over shoes and blouses, and I didn't mind as I smiled at the back while the two gushed over about cute boys in school and hair products while looking at trendy dresses. I joined them after a while, and Angela knew well to avoid the topic of boys when I was around Alice. She knew I would be uncomfortable telling someone all over again about what happened, and I thanked her mentally for that. I decided not to tell Alice about Michael in the days to pass.

Sunday went by quickly, and I spent the afternoon baking some cookies while Jasper had some of his friends over at home. I gave them a bowl-full of the chewy chocolate chips that I'd made, and they all gave me several hoots of woo's and thank you's.

As Monday came by, I decided I would sit next to Alice at lunch after first period, and she introduced me to her other brother, the older one in Jasper' batch and the one who owned the jeep, Emmett. He was a quite a large guy with a large, muscular build, and as we exchanged hello's and small talk, I wondered to myself why I was making friends with Edward's siblings. They weren't like Edward, I suppose. I then told myself that it would be extremely unfair to them if I judged their personalities based on how much of a jerk their brother acted towards me, so I shook the thought away.

I heard the cafeteria door open suddenly, but I didn't jerk my head to see who had come in, not that I felt it was important.

"Bella, Emmett and I will be getting more drinks, if you don't mind. Do you want anything? Sprite? Water? Cheese Fries?" Alice said.

I shuddered. The cheese fries here in school, along with everything else, were absolutely horrid. "No thank you," I smiled back. "Help yourselves!" And the two of them walked along the cafeteria hall, Alice almost skipping.

**EPOV**

She was there. In the cafeteria. With Alice and Emmett.

_Shit._

I didn't know what to do, but eventually decided on the stupidest thing possible: I decided to sit with them. As I headed over towards their table, though, Alice danced off towards the food counter while dragging Emmett along with her. This would leave me alone with Bella, which I didn't think I was prepared to do just yet. I scanned the room for other vacant seats. None.

I didn't have a choice, and I would look like an idiot if I made a run for it, which I wanted so desperately to do.

But I owed Bella a proper apology. And I guessed that I had to do it at some point in my life right? So I might as well just get it over with.

I put my Jansport on an empty seat on the table, and sat down next to her. God, help me.

"Hi," I began. She suddenly jerked her head towards my direction, surprised, and I felt my chest pound as she stared daggers at me in what felt like forever. Finally though, she shifted her gaze away from my nervous, probably-sweating, pathetic self, and started playing with her food.

"Hi," I said again, and I mentally slapped myself across the face for even trying. She obviously didn't want to talk to me, so why was I even trying this much?

She finally spoke after a period of silence. "Hi, Leaving." She said, looking away from me.

I sighed. Very funny.

"Listen, I—" I began.

"No, you listen." She interrupted. "I'm not stupid. I know you don't like me, and guess what? I don't like you either, douchebag. Your siblings, however, are extremely nice and I like them so I gave myself the liberty of being friends with them, but I don't think I could do the same for you, Edward." I could see tears starting to well up in her eyes, but at the same time, I felt a shiver down my spine when she said my name… and it was the good kind. What the fuck was that?

"I—I heard about what happened. I didn't mean what I said, okay?" I began. "I didn't even know you kind of had dibs on that back building, someone just told me about it. I was stupid. I thought I could take a drag there and—"

Before I knew it, she grabbed her things, left her tray, and proceeded towards the door. What. The. Fuck. What the hell did I do wrong?

"Edward, what the hell did you _do!?"_ I suddenly heard Alice exclaim from behind me, looking bewildered. Emmett looked just about as dumbfounded as she did.

"I was apologizing for last Wednesday, okay? I didn't even say anything! She just stormed off out of the room like that and—and—"

Alice put down the tray of sparkling water and gelatin down at the table quickly. "Apologize for what?" she asked. "Edward, what the hell did you do?"

I let out a deep breath. This was going to be one hell of an explanation.

* * *

**I don't take negative reviews personally, so again, if I you feel that something's not right, feel free to point it out! I shall try my best to write better for everyone. Happy reading!**


	10. Him

**I got all feelsy while I writing this. I hope you guys like it as much as I do. Tee hee.**

**SM owns the Twilight Universe and all related characters.**

* * *

**BPOV**

"I didn't mean what I said okay?" said Edward, loudly. "I didn't even know you had dibs on that back building! Someone just told me about it." He began to stutter and I could feel he was nervous, because his hands were shaking like crazy as he waved them around, trying to explain. "I was stupid," he continued. "I just wanted to take a drag there and—"

Before I knew it, I grabbed my things from the table and proceeded to walk quickly towards the cafeteria's exit. I almost wanted the ground to swallow me whole, and I felt like an idiot as I pieced everything together. Edward didn't know, of course he didn't know. And I couldn't believe how stupid I was to not even piece the simplest kind of information together. I felt such a strong degree of embarrassment that I just ran and ran farther away from the cafeteria, bumping into people along the hallway. Surely I could have guessed that as he had been a new face, he wouldn't have known? And that if Alice didn't know, of course Edward didn't either?

But the anger I had towards Edward insulting Michael's memory—even if he didn't do it on purpose—still lingered in my head. I had loved Michael, and I still do. No one can talk about him like that. Although—

Surely Edward didn't mean to say such things about him?

I shook the thought away from my head. I was in total denial, still wanting to save myself from the embarrassment. I balled my fists as I ran towards the end of the hall and out of the beige door again that led to the back building. I knew I could find solace there; I would be able to clear my head, and I would bask once more in the feel of Michael's presence.

The familiar trail leading to the back building started to look hazy and blurry as tears filled my eyes for the millionth time this week.

"Stop crying." I said to myself, out loud. My heart hammered as I walked briskly across the football field, the throbbing fresh from the feel of embarrassment from the events that occurred just minutes ago. "Stop crying," I repeated, loudly.

And I continued chanting this to myself, ordering my tears to stop falling. I felt weak and pathetic as it had dawned on me that there hasn't been a single day since the accident that I hadn't stopped shedding these stupid, salty tears.

I repeated the chanting more and more as I made it nearer our spot. "Stop crying," I told myself. "Stop crying, stop crying, stop crying, stop—"

I stopped dead on my tracks.

There was someone else in our spot at the back building: two people. And I was as sure as my life depended on it that neither of them were Edward.

**EPOV**

"You knew about it and you didn't even bother _telling_ me?" I shouted, and all eyes in the cafeteria were suddenly looking at the direction that Alice, and Emmett, and I were sitting on.

Alice rolled her eyes. "For Christ's sake, Edward, it was on _the news! _I just wanted to be friends and make her feel a bit better, while you, on the other hand—"

"She needs space." I said, suddenly feeling concern towards Bella.

"Oh, I'm sorry. Friendship was the only thing I was after," Alice said, rolling her eyes a second time. "And for your information, I never even asked her about it. Not once. I just wanted to be nice, unlike you." She stared daggers at me.

"I'm sorry Ed, but in all honesty, I have to side with Alice. You didn't have to be such a dick to Bella," said Emmett, narrowing his eyes while shaking his head slowly in disapproval.

And they were right. I was a dick to Bella, and nobody deserved that, especially not her.

I grabbed my Jansport from the table and started to make my way towards the exit, but Alice stopped me, grabbing my wrist.

"Where do you think you're going?" She asked accusingly. "We're not through."

I sighed. "Yes we are," I began. "And I need to make it up to her." I pried my wrist out of Alice's grasp and pushed the double doors of the cafeteria open. I could feel almost everyone staring at us, probably wondering what the fuck was going on. But I brushed it off, slung my Jansport over my shoulder and began to make my way to the only place I knew Bella would probably be.

**BPOV**

"Bella! Come, sit down with us," Mike greeted a most insincere greeting. Along with him was Tanya Denali, one of the school's cheerleaders, and one of my sworn enemies. She had purposefully dipped my hair in red paint back in 5th grade, in art class, and ever since we had been the most ruthless of rivals up until freshman year, when I decided to ignore her completely.

"Hey Bella," she greeted, her voice slurring. On her right hand was a flask with what I assumed was alcohol inside it, and she began to chug it like crazy after which she spontaneously planted soft kisses on Mike's neck.

I know that sometimes he meant well, I had to admit. Mike was one of the friends who tried to comfort me the other day, after all. But most times, like now, I just wanted to punch him across the face. He knew how much this place meant to me, and yet here he was, sitting cross-legged on the grass, gesturing for me to sit down next to him and Tanya.

"Here, take a joint with me," he said. His eyes were red and puffy, and I could tell he was as high as a kite.

"W-what are you doing here?" I asked as I felt myself stutter. I eyed Tanya and her flask, and she chugged some more of it down as some of it spilled on her chest, and on her green blouse that gloriously showed off all the cleavage that she had.

"Getting baked like a cake, that's what." Mike replied, kissing Tanya on the cheek. "I thought you wouldn't mind since, you know. We're friends and everything."

"Actually I do, I do mind." I said firmly. I knew that there were but a handful of people who made out here at the back building and have gotten drunk over the years, but Mike knew that this was a special place for me. And I'm sure he knew that I minded.

He laughed. "You don't really own the place, Bella." And he was right. I didn't, but it was me and Michael's secret spot nonetheless.

"And besides," Mike continued as he stood up. "I'm kind of a Michael too, you know." He flashed his school ID in front of my face, and I spotted his full name in bold, capital letters underneath his ID picture.

"Michael James Newton", it said.

"I know what your name is," I laughed sarcastically. "But don't be a dick about it."

He suddenly grabbed me by the waist and pressed my torso against his flimsy chest. "Why not?" he asked, and I tried to pry him away. Tanya laughed casually in the background as if she were watching a sitcom.

"Fuck off, Mike!" I screamed, and he attempted to cup my face with one of his hands.

"I've always liked you Bella," he said, laughing, his eyes still bloodshot from the weed. "And since Michael's, well, dead, it shouldn't come as a surprise to you that another Michael comes and claims what's his."

I felt my face redden in anger as I slapped Mike with my free hand and spat on his face. "You insolent fuck," I shouted, my tears spilling on my shirt. Tanya was now unaware of her surroundings, trying to catch a small butterfly with her hand while sitting down. Mike only laughed some more. I tried harder to push him away, but the harder I tried, the tighter his grip got. I felt absolutely helpless.

But out of nowhere, I felt a pair of hands pry me away from Mike as I fell down the grass, and there was an undeniable sound that I'm sure was a punch across the face.

It was Edward.

"Get the fuck off of her, you son of a bitch." He firmly said as he proceeded to push Mike towards the ground. He was wearing an almost see-through white shirt, and I could see his biceps flex as he balled his fists.

Mike cowered against the wall of the building, suddenly looking small compared to Edward who was at least 6 feet high. "Take it easy pal!" he stammered. "We were just—we were just playing!" Tanya looked horrified, looking like she was sobering up. She scurried next to Mike and wiped the blood off of his mouth as she knelt beside him. "Oh baby, no!" avoiding Edward's gaze, she cried. How gross.

Edward towered over Mike, and he mumbled something under his breath, barely audible. "If you fucking touch her or anybody like that again, I swear to God—"

I scrambled as I made an effort to stand up from the untrimmed grass, my palms itching to end the argument, denying to myself that I had found it amusing. If a fight ensued right then and there, we would be in big trouble, especially since alcohol and drugs were lying around in plain sight. I ran towards Edward and grabbed his wrist, pulling him aside. "Stop," I said. "Stop it."

Mike got to his feet and held Tanya's hand tightly, and they both ran back towards the Science and Technology Complex, past the old library, across the football field, and out of sight.

I couldn't help but let out a short laugh as I watched in amusement as they both disappeared into the distance. I was beaming at our victory and I felt so fulfilled that I almost forgot that I had shared the victory with somebody else.

"Are you—are you okay? Did he hurt you?" Edward suddenly asked, unknowingly alerting me that he was still around.

I felt extremely embarrassed and suddenly felt myself blush red.

"No… not really. I'll—I'll be alright," I stuttered.

The atmosphere suddenly felt tense and awkward. Edward opened his mouth as if to say something, closed it again, opened it a second time, and continued. "I'm—I'm sorry if I said anything that might have offended you back there, in the cafeteria. I just—I just wanted to say I was sorry, and I thought I might find you here…" his voice trailed off.

I gave him a small smile. "Thank you," I said, and proceeded to look down at my shoes.

"No big," Edward smiled, staring at his shoes as well. "Uhm… I have to get to third period now though, but I don't want to leave you here either," he began.

"I have third period, too." I answered, and I realized that that meant we would have to walk together back to class. I stared at his emerald green eyes, and I felt myself lost in them as I began to wash all of the bad thoughts my mind has always contained away, unknowingly. I felt my heart jump. I had no idea what was happening.

"Do you, uhm…" he began, his voice soft. His ears were turning a bright shade of pink. He started to ramble. "Would it be okay with you if I walked you to class? I mean- it wouldn't mean anything, really. It's just that—that Mike guy was a total douche and he shouldn't have touched you like that, and I guess I—"

I smiled at him, a genuine smile this time. "It's alright, I don't mind." I said.

"Okay, that's great, but you don't have to go with me if you don't want to. I mean, if you want, you could go ahead, and I could just wait here until you're gone. Then I could go ahead afterwards and—"

"I really don't mind, Edward," I laughed, interrupting. I suppose the tension of the atmosphere was getting to the both of us.

"Well," he began, letting out a breath, his hands on his hips. His eyes squinted against the sun and he proceeded to look at me. "Shall we, then?"

"We shall," I agreed, and we both walked off towards the main building as I felt my I-Hate-Edward scale drop down from a 10 to a 1. Okay, fine. Maybe a zero.

* * *

**Will try to update real soon. Cheers!**


	11. Chapter 11

**Yes they're beginning to be at ease towards each other bit by bit, and I'm loving it as much as I hope you are! This chapter's for all of ya'll. :3**

* * *

**EPOV**

I was walking next to Bella to my third class, and for some reason I couldn't comprehend, my heart was throbbing, fast.

"_Shut your fucking face, Edward, she's just a girl." _I unwarily mumbled to myself under my breath.

"Pardon?" Bella asked, her chestnut hair waved as her head turned to ask, and her beautiful brown eyes glowed, as did her rosy red cheeks. _Fuck._

"N-nothing," I stammered defensively. "I—I was just talking to myself. It happens, you know. Sometimes."

Bella smiled a small smile. "Oh," she huffed, and let out a short breath. The atmosphere was once again awkward and silent between the two of us as we opened the dysfunctional knob of the beige door that led us back to the main building.

"And your class is where…?" I began, feeling the tension build up the more steps we took as we walked. I felt so silly, like a thirteen year old trying to ask a girl out for the first time, and that wasn't even the case. I just owed this girl an apology, and I was merely making it up to her by walking her to class. But why did I feel my ears go pink every time I opened my mouth to talk to her?

"History." She said, snapping me out of my thoughts. "Third floor. And you?"

"World Lit. Also the third floor," I answered, and I wished we had something else to talk about to rid the atmosphere of the tension, but try as I might, my mind was a complete blank.

"Huh. I guess we have opposite schedules then," she said, "I have World Lit in the morning when you have History, I guess." Her eyebrows furrowed. _Fuck_. I said to myself, in my head this time. _How cute._

We walked in silence again until we reached the staircase.

"But we do have Poseid—I mean, Marine Biology together?" she said, shaking her head.

_Poseid_ _what_? I wondered, thinking.

As if she read my thoughts, she answered, slowly. "I meant to say Poseidonology," she said, and she smiled an almost sad smile. But it was a smile nonetheless. "Mich- uhm, one of my old friends called it that, because he said the term 'Marine Biology' was a hell of a lot harder to say. And lamer." She chuckled.

I laughed back, although almost not noticing that she had almost said "Michael" in place of "one of her old friends". I quickly decided to brush it off, not wanting to remind her of the situation.

"They're both six syllables," I said, comparing the words. I held up my hand to count. "Ma-rine-Bi-o-lo-gy," I counted, and had six fingers in front of my face.

Bella chuckled. "Po-sei-don-o-lo-gy," she answered back, holding her short fingers up in mid-air, at shoulder's length, for me to see. She laughed a sincere laugh, and I wondered how she felt; if she was sad that this word reminded her of Michael, or if she genuinely found it silly that both terms were equally six syllables. I hoped it was the latter. I didn't want to her to feel sad anymore.

"Well that's kind of dumb," she began, and I was surprised she was taking this so lightly. "They _do_ both have the same amount of syllables."

"But yeah, it's a whole lot cooler when someone says 'Poseidonology' instead of 'Marine Biology," I chuckled back. We were engaging in small talk as we walked, and I could feel the tension in the atmosphere leave our presence bit by bit.

"Well, I guess we're here." she suddenly said, stopping on her tracks in front of a door that said "M302." A smile was still playing around Bella's lips and it looked almost… genuine. And I hoped that it was.

"I guess so," I said.

Just as the atmosphere was lightening up bit by bit, it suddenly dawned on both of us that we both had no idea how to say goodbye to each other in this particular situation. A hug would be too much, and a handshake would feel too formal—

And as if on cue, she held up her hand, her fist all balled up a-la fistbump style, signaling that I bump it with mine in turn. And I was about too, only I didn't, because I mistook it for a high-five, and slapped her balled fist instead.

_Awkward._

She laughed, and this time, her laugh sounded like she hadn't laughed like that in decades. It sounded almost musical, and I shied away and looked at my sneakers instead, feeling my ears turn pink for the third time in the day.

"It happens," she said, slumping her shoulders. "You wanna try again?"

"What? A high-five or a fist bump?" I eyed her as she furrowed her eyebrows again, thinking.

"Let's just do both. A fist-five!" she said. She sounded like a little 7 year old spotting an ice cream truck on a hot summer day. God, was she cute.

_Shut up, Edward._

And she balled her fist up a second time, and I slapped my palm lightly against it.

"There we go," I said, smiling. I decided that I felt comfortable with Bella, in spite of our horrible first meeting. And I meant it. I felt great around her. She was a fun girl if you give her enough time to show herself, and it wasn't fair that something like the accident had to happen to her.

"Well, I'll see you around," she smiled, and proceeded to look at her shoes again, holding the sling of her backpack against her shoulder. She waved goodbye and I waved back, and soon, she disappeared into the room and I was left alone in the hallway.

"I'll see you, Bella," I said to myself, the door closed at my face, not knowing I was blushing like mad as I made my way towards my World Lit class.

**BPOV**

As I rode back with Jasper in his SUV on the way home, I couldn't help but think about me and Edward's interaction this afternoon, and I couldn't understand what I was feeling. I felt so at ease, like the bad thoughts in my head had suddenly left me and I felt as light as a feather once again. Almost as if—

I shuddered at the thought, and guilt suddenly engulfed me. This was almost the same way I'd felt whenever Michael was around, and the feeling was all too familiar.

The I-Hate-Edward scale just gained back two of its points as it moved up to a 2 from a zero. I cursed at the fact that he made me feel so at ease now, after he had practically saved me from Mike Newton and Tanya, that I actually forgot about Michael; it's almost been a month since the accident, and I felt so guilty that Edward and I even joked about stuff like Poseidonology, and fist-fives. Michael and I had our share of awkward fist-fives before, but we had never made into an actual thing. So would this be a Bella and Edward thing now?

_Shut up, Bella. Stop thinking about it._ I told myself, as I stared out the window, night almost blanketing the sky. It was twilight now, and I could barely make out the trees as the car whizzed past them.

_You do not like Edward Cullen. You do not like him. You are not fond of him, even. Edward Cullen was a douchebag when you met him, and he's a douchebag right now for making you feel this way._

I could feel myself picking on my nails again, but as soon as I noticed what I was doing, I suddenly stopped, knowing Jasper might call out on me again.

"What's on your mind, Bells?" he asked, breaking the silence along with my thoughts of Edward.

Tucking my hair beneath my earlobe, I sighed. "Nothing,"

"You're not very good at lying, you know. You never were." Jasper smiled at me, then kept his eyes on the road once more.

"It's really nothing," I repeated, hoping to convince him. I tried to change the topic afterwards.

"I was late for History this afternoon, although I got an A for the pop quiz that I almost missed."

"You were late?" he asked, raising an eyebrow. "You're never late. What happened?"

"I lost track of the time, chit-chatting with Angela." I immediately lied, hoping he would just drop the topic.

"Like I said," he sighed, still keeping his eyes on the road. "You were never really good at lying."

I didn't say anything back, hoping that he wouldn't either. Thankfully, we spent the rest of the car ride in silence, fumbling with the radio until we made it home.

**EPOV**

_**Tuesday, after school**_

"PARTY ON THURSDAYYYYYYY!" Emmett bellowed from the kitchen, and I'm pretty sure I felt my eardrums bleed agonizingly at the sound of his booming voice.

Alice tilted her head from the counter. "Isn't that a school night?" She asked.

"Oh, ho-ho," Emmett started. "And that, little sister, is where you're wrong. It's Principal McKinsey's birthday on Friday, and he's practically declaring it a holiday. We can party all night long on Thursday, drinks all around!"

Alice sighed. "Emmett, you already hosted a party a few weeks ago. You're having one again?"

"Why not?" Emmett smirked, helping himself to the carton of orange juice that he got from the fridge.

"Mom and dad will be furious at all this money you'll be spending on another Port Angeles venue, is why not!" Alice scolded, both her hands suddenly flat on the counter.

Emmett made an annoying beeping sound, like the ones from the buzzers on game shows when contestants get the answers wrong. "That's where you're wrong again, sister dear! Because mom and dad will be out of town Friday night, up till Monday, and we have the house all to ourselves the whole weekend!"

I jerked my head away from the show I was watching on TV. "No way?" I asked.

Emmett nodded slowly, his face victorious. "Yes way. They're off to 'visit Aunt Delilah' again in Lake Union." He said, forming quotation marks in the air. "Ha! For all I know they'll be spending the weekend in Seattle having another secret mini-honeymoon."

Alice and I both rolled our eyes at Emmett in unison. Although it possible that they were going to visit Aunt Delilah again, it was more likely that they _were_ going to have the weekend off instead (else they would have asked us to visit Aunt Delilah and the cousins _with_ them), what with all the stress from work that they've been going through. My parents loved each other very much, and I was glad they still did things like this whenever we weren't around.

I turned my head back to what I was watching on TV, and continued to surf channels until it was time for dinner, after which I retreated to my bedroom a few hours later. At around 11pm, Alice went knocking at my door and complained that she couldn't sleep, so I let her in my room so we could chat a bit to ease her little case of insomnia. I told her about how Bella and I had made up, although I left out the part where I almost beat Mike Newton to a pulp after I walked in on him almost harassing her. Alice nodded in approval, and she proceeded to talk about how much of a nice girl Bella was, and how interesting it was to talk to her. Apparently she and Alice like the same movies, and they both spent lunch earlier gushing about Pretty Woman and My Best Friend's Wedding or some shit.

The next day, Alice, Emmett and I were extra early for school for no particular reason. Mom had made us some of her special iced coffee to chug on the way to school, and we had a big breakfast together. As soon as we were done, the three of us kissed our parents goodbye and Alice and I made our way to my Volvo, and Emmett, to his Jeep.

"Why don't I drive today, Eddie? I really feel like driving today." Alice asked me in the garage. I groaned. I always hated it when she asked for favors like this, but she had this power against me that made it almost impossible to refuse her requests. I threw her the keys, made it inside the passenger's seat and secured my seatbelt. Alice took the driver's seat , and we both put our iced coffees in the cup holder. "Don't worry, baby," I said, talking to my Volvo with my eyes closed, pretending to pray for our safety. "It's just for today. It's just for today." Alice wasn't really the best driver, but she wasn't bad either, so I let her drive on occasion. My dad insisted that she get a car of her own, but Alice argued that she wanted to "reduce her carbon footprint", to which my parents couldn't argue back, as Alice meant well.

She started the engine, backed up the car, and we started our way towards school. I took a sip of my iced coffee casually.

Alice had her eyes on the road and started speaking abruptly. "So I was thinking of fetching Bella from home today, what do you think?"

I suddenly felt myself choke on my coffee and began coughing, liquid spilling out of my mouth.

"What the hell, Edward! Ew, ew, ew!" Alice squeaked. "Go grab my purse! I have a pack of baby wipes in there somewhere."

I carefully opened Alice's purse and searched frantically for the wipes, and cleaned myself up.

"Bella's—Bella's riding with us today?" I stammered. I could feel my heart starting to beat wildly in my chest again out of fear. It was out of control.

"Yeah, I texted her this morning. Jasper's calling in sick today. Food poisoning, I think. So I asked Bella if she wanted to hitch a ride with the two of us, and she said yes!" Alice said, excitement apparent in her voice.

"Jesus, Edward. What's wrong with your ears? They're as pink as a 7-year-old girl's bedroom!"

I felt my ears. They were almost scorching hot. "Too much coffee," I quickly lied.

Thankfully, Alice bought it. She spent the rest of the ride talking to me about how cute she thought Bella's brother Jasper was, and I wanted to listen. I really did. But the fact was, for some reason unknown to me, I was a nervous wreck just thinking about how Bella would be riding with us to school.

Alice made a few turns along the road, and before I knew it, we were in front of a small, two-storey house big enough for exactly three people. The walls were a nice, peach color, and there was a big garden up front, surrounded by a white fence. There were two trees on either side of the house, and there was also a little driveway, and a small garage.

"What are you waiting for?" Alice asked. "Go ring the doorbell!"

"What?" I was horrified. "Why don't you do it?"

"Because I'm driving, and your side is nearer the door. Plus I have to fix my make up," she said.

I sighed. "Fine."

I opened the passenger door and made my way across the driveway and on to the front door. I rang the door bell once, and almost immediately, Bella swung the door open, her hair still wet and her cheeks flushing in a strawberry red color.

"Uhm, hi?" I greeted, awkwardly. "Alice said we were gonna pick you up, so…"

But Bella was just staring at me, and I felt that she was somewhat lost in her thoughts.

After a moment, she seemed to snap out of it. "Right," She finally said, giving me a curt nod. She swung her backpack across her shoulders and we made our way back to the car. I opened the door for her and she slid down the backseat.

She and Alice exchanged hellos and greeted each other a good morning, and they began to talk about almost everything under the sun.

"Oh wait, before I forget!" Alice exclaimed, her voice squeaking again like it always did whenever she was excited. "We're having a party on Thursday at home! I'd be so glad if you could join us."

_Oh, God._

* * *

**I love reviews like I love sushi. Hihi.**


	12. Chapter 12

**BPOV**

"Sure, why not?" I smiled towards Alice, who had just invited me to a party in their house on Thursday. I felt that I needed to get out more, that I shouldn't keep wallowing in misery over what happened. And even though I felt what happened was partly my fault, I kept that fact hidden underneath my subconscious and decided to have fun for the weekend, with every intention of forgetting. Because maybe that's what I needed. Maybe I needed to forget, just for a little while. I was already suffocating inside. I needed air, and I needed it bad.

Alice squeaked back loudly, happy that I had accepted her invite. "You could spend the night over, too, if you want to!" she said, beaming with her eyes on the road.

I laughed, and I was happy that my new friend was excited to have me present at any event of hers. "Okay," I nodded, smiling.

"Yay!" Alice squeaked again, louder this time, and I could see Edward cover his ears, his long, pale fingers touching his auburn hair.

"Alice, do you mind?" Edward groaned, taking a sip of the drink from the cup holder. "I kind of wanted to start this morning right, you know?"

It was funny how their relationship reminded me of Jasper and I, how we would bicker like this in the car, in the mornings when I was still happy, before the accident happened.

And at the thought, I began to pick on my nails again for the nth time. They started to hurt, but I didn't want to stop. I was thankful I was at the backseat, else Alice and Edward would have seen that I was bleeding again.

"So uhm, Bella," Edward started, sounding awkward and attempting to start conversation with me. I snickered in my head. "How… uhm, how are things?"

I kept my eyes on the window, counting the raindrops again. It took me a while to come out of my stupor once more, but I managed to answer back. "Well in spite of the fact that we were late when you walked me to class yesterday," I said. "I got an A in the pop quiz Mr. Binns gave out,"

"Your teacher's Mr. Binns, too?" Edward asked, his head turned around from the passenger seat up front to face me. He was grinning, and he looked wonderful, no matter how much I wanted to deny it.

"Like I said, we have the same teachers, but opposite schedules," I smiled, shuffling my feet in the car.

"Wait, you walked her to class?" Alice asked, amazed and dumbfounded.

"Well uhm, I—" I began.

"We… we just bumped into each other right after I apologized, so uhm…" Edward started. I figured he must not want Alice to know about what happened between me, Mike, him, and Tanya.

Alice squeaked again from the driver's seat. "I'm so glad we're making so many new friends, Edward!"

I blushed as I looked out the window. I was glad, too.

The next day, Jasper was still sick with the stomach flu and I had to hitch a ride with Edward and Alice again. I was thankful that they were both glad to have me around, as I wanted to sink in my seat out of embarrassment. "It's no big," the twins repeated over and over.

The ride was more comfortable than the last as Edward and I surprisingly did most of the talking, Alice on the passenger's side this time while Edward drove. We sat in a comfortable silence when we ran out of things to talk about, and as I watched as the greenery of Forks whizzed past my window, I let my walls down and let my memories back in, unknowingly, as I drifted off to sleep.

~o~

The last time we talked face-to-face in school, you and I fought. It was a Tuesday, and we didn't ride the bus together on Tuesdays. This day, I rode with Jasper. I was thankful, not wanting to see you during one of our fights. They had never been pretty.

"Mom has something for you," he beamed at me, and I looked at him stupidly, wondering what my mother could have given me. My birthday had passed months before, and Christmas was out of the question as December wouldn't land on the calendar for more than a few months later. Slowly, he suddenly parked the car to the side of the road, and stopped the engine.

"Jasper, what the hell—" I started to wonder what he was doing.

"Give me your hand, come on." Jasper said, sternly. If this was another one of his practical jokes, and if he placed a spider on my hand like he's done countless of times before, I swore that I would flip out and leave the car.

But out of his pocket came a George Harrisson keychain, my favorite Beatle, and suddenly, I could hear something dangling and jingling from inside. I smiled in amazement, my eyes wide open as I let Jasper drop a car key in the palm of my hand.

"No. Fucking. Way." I breathed.

"You better believe it." Jasper laughed. "I can finally get myself some alone time in my own car finally, too." He joked.

"But… why?" I asked, still in disbelief.

"Mom and I talked, and she decided to reward you on how well you've been doing in school recently, and we thought it would be perfect since you just finished your driving lessons," Jasper said, starting the engine again. "We talked to Dr. Glover too, and she gave us your progress report. You've been doing really well, I hear." He continued, smiling with his eyes on the road.

My heart started skipping wildly at the thought. This would be a second option that I needed to save gas on money. I thought about Michael, and since he and I could both drive now and we both had the means, I decided we would take turns and drive each other to school during the succeeding days.

Only I'd forgotten one little fact, overthrown by the happiness that I felt over my new car: I had forgotten that Michael was mad at me.

Anxiously, I searched my bag for my phone, opened my messages folder, and typed in a text for him.

"_Hi baby,"_ I started to type. _"Can we please not be mad at each other anymore? :("_

In a few seconds, my phone started to blink, signaling a reply.

"_I don't know."_ the screen of the phone said.

I sighed. He was always so stubborn. I searched for his number on my phonebook and began to dial. As soon as it rang, he put the phone down.

_Ugh._

When Jasper and I got home from school, I tried dialing Michael's number again, but this time, his phone was off. I groaned as I jumped and sat on the beanbag in my room, my feet against the tiles of the floor. I had chosen for my room to be lined with blue tiles when we first had the house constructed, as it reminded me of the sea, which I loved so dearly. The sea held so many nice memories of my childhood, and how me, Michael, and my friends would go visit the ocean at the La Push reservation whenever we had the chance. This always made me feel like everything was going to be alright.

I opened my phone again and sent Michael another text. _"Can I buy you off with cookies?"_ I started to type, and then continued, wanting to tell him about my new car, a red Civic, but decided against it. _"I have a surprise for you tomorrow :D"_ I finished off the text and hit send.

My phone blinked suddenly. Michael's phone was on again.

"_*sigh* what do you want?"_ he replied, and I could feel that the tone of his text was a bit cold. He was still mad at me.

I felt angry, angry that I was trying to reach out so badly but he was still pushing me away_. "Uhm,"_ I began to text_. "I'll just see you at Samson Street tomorrow, at the bus station, okay?"_ I hit send.

Late, in the dead of night, my phone began to vibrate. I checked the screen to see who on earth could be calling me at this ungodly hour.

"Michael McConnell," the screen of my phone said, his picture on the LCD. Even though we were mad at each other, I still smiled at his photo, admiring his bushy hair and eyebrows, his pink lips, his rosy cheeks, his stubble, and his wonderful almond eyes.

I picked up the phone.

"Hello?" I called, my voice still hoarse from sleep.

"I don't think I want to be mad anymore," Michael said over the other line, and I smiled while I hugged one of my pillows.

"Oh?" I said, and my voice sounded thick, and horrible. I yawned. This was bad timing. "Michael?" I said, pressing my face near the receiver.

"Yes?" he said, after a pause.

"Can we properly, _properly_ make up tomorrow instead? Because I'm really, really, sleepy. I'm so sorry. I stayed up last night studying for that Biology quiz that we missed when we cut classes."

Michael laughed. "Okay," he said, and I could hear him smile.

"Good night. I love you to the moon." I said.

"I love you to the moon." And I heard a small smacking sound as I heard him give off a flying kiss on the other end of the line.

I put down the phone, desperate for sleep, but just as I started to, Michael sent me another text, a longer one this time.

"_I heard you signed us up for Marine Biology elective classes. Err… not to keen with the idea, but whatever floats your boat."_

There was a short space, and below that, I could make out a few more sentences.

"_Also, why do they call it Marine Biology?" the message continued. "It's such… a long ass name. Why don't they call it something like Poseidonology, instead?"_

He was being adorable. I shook my head as I chuckled and switched my phone off, and went back to sleep.

But if I had known that this was going to be the last text message that he sent me, that he would ever send me, I would have replied quicker than a millisecond. And I regret not doing so to this day.

I dreamt a dreamless sleep, excited to greet Michael at the bus station with my new Civic. All of these thoughts lingered in my head right before I drifted away into unconsciousness, not knowing that I would never see Michael alive again after that night.

~o~

**EPOV**

"Bella? Bella! Wake up! Edward, wake her up, she's crying, for Chrissakes!" Alice shouted as I parked the car frantically when we reached school. Bella was asleep, but she was crying like mad, and her tears wouldn't stop falling as Alice tried to shake her awake.

I took off my seatbelt and opened the backseat door.

"Bella!" I shouted as I tried to shake her awake with Alice. Her tears wouldn't stop falling from under the dark circles of her eyes, and it pained me to see her like this. I wanted to make her stop hurting, and the only way I knew how, as of the moment, was to wake her the fuck up.

I lightly slapped her on her cheek several times, and finally, she began to squint her eyes open.

"What?" she asked, looking around, my hands still on her shoulders. "What's going on?"

Alice asked me to scoot over as she made her way further into the backseat of the car. "You were having a bad dream, Bella. You were crying and you wouldn't wake up," Alice said, sadly.

Bella blushed, looking embarrassed, tears still in her eyes. "I'm sorry…" she began. "It won't—it won't happen again," and she looked at her hands on her lap, and I could tell she wanted the ground to swallow her whole as much as I wanted the same thing to happen to me when I realized what I had done to her when we first met.

"No sweetie, it's okay," Alice said, engulfing her in a tight hug, smoothing out her hair. "It's okay."

I let out a breath, feeling a little victorious that we had been able to finally wake Bella up, but at the same time, feeling distressed because not even a joyride to school could make her forget about all the bad things that happened to her.

Bella opened the other side of the door, grabbed her backpack, and I did the same, grabbing my Jansport from the backseat and closed the door.

"You okay?" I asked, feeling sad because she was.

"I'm fine," she said, tucking her hair underneath her ear. "I'll be fine. It was just a dream."

"You'll be okay, you know? I sincerely believe that." I said, meaning every single word that came out of my mouth. "Maybe not today, but someday, you will be."

She suddenly held out her hand, gesturing for me to take it. She smiled at me, and it was another sincere, genuine smile, like one of the smiles she had given me when we talked about Poseidonology the other day.

I took her hand and she squeezed it back, letting go after a few seconds. I blushed at the gesture, and I thanked God that Bella didn't notice me flush as we made our way inside campus.


	13. Chapter 13

**THINGS ARE GOING TO HAPPEN SOON AND I AM FLIPPING OUT**

* * *

**EPOV**

It was Thursday night. The party had begun.

Carefully, I helped Emmett make some last minute arrangements and placed a stack of plastic cups and shot glasses on the counter for people and their drinks. Alice had hired one of her older friends, a college student majoring in Hotel and Restaurant Management, as a bartender. Across the counter, I watched him as he tipped over a bottle of Bacardi into a shot glass. He called me over and asked if I wanted to take it, but I politely declined. I was staying sober tonight.

All of a sudden, the doorbell rang, and our first guests arrived. They were a bunch of seniors whose faces were unfamiliar to me, and they made themselves comfortable, two couples from the group sitting on the couch whilst holding hands. It was around 8:40pm in the evening, and Emmett started to raise the sound system's volume on full blast.

Bit by bit, more people came in. Most of them were seniors, and the bunch of juniors that I knew were either douchey-looking, or people that I outright did not like, such as Mike Newton. I hadn't told my siblings about our encounter, so I chose to retreat to my room to hide from Mike, Tanya, and the other jerks, and looked for a good book to read.

10pm passed by, and I realized that Bella had probably already arrived. Frantically, I fumbled in my closet looking for my best clothes, not knowing in the back of my mind that I wanted to look nice just for Bella. And at last, after what seemed like hours of rummaging through my closet, I found a collared, pale blue shirt, rolled up my sleeves, and made my way downstairs.

**BPOV**

"AND THE PARTY HAS OFFICIALLY STARTEEEEEEEED!" Emmett boomed as he opened the door to welcome me, and my smile turned genuine again as I grinned ear to ear. I arrived a little after 10pm. _This night would be a night to be spent in order to forget_, I told myself_, and tonight would be a night I would finally have fun again after weeks._

Alice came out of nowhere unexpectedly, and grabbed my arm. She was a little tipsy now, and she held on to me for balance. "You all know Bella, yeah!?" she shouted, raising her fist.

People from all over Forks High who were present in the Cullens' massive home, along with some kids from the reservation, gave me a woot, and I smiled. There were people I knew, and people I didn't. People I liked, and people that I chose to ignore throughout my high school life. Brushing it aside, as long as the people wouldn't be Mike Newton, who I now deemed an enemy, I told myself that I would try to get along with everyone at this party.

A few shots later, and I was beginning to feel tipsy as well. "Alright, Bella!" the students of Forks High bellowed as I chugged down my fifth shot. My mother would completely disapprove of this behavior, but I defended myself, saying that I was only having a little fun. Besides, everyone had designated sober drivers in one corner, having as much fun as we were without the alcohol.

But out of the blue, a thought had hit me. Where was Edward?

"_Where's Edward?"_ I asked Alice, shouting, my voice barely recognizable throughout the bass of the music.

"_What?"_ Alice asked back, her face scrunched up. She was still dancing in the makeshift dancefloor.

"_I said where's Edward?"_ I shouted again,.

And then, as if on cue, a beautiful boy came down from the stairs, with a pale blue collared shirt on. It was Edward, his bronze hair as messy as ever, his green eyes sparkling against the orange lights of the house. He smiled at me from across the room, and as I smiled back, I felt my heart skip a bit. What was happening to me?

Suddenly, Tanya showed up on my left, and invited me over for some more shots. She and her little group of cheerleader friends had formed a circle around the living room, and they were playing some sort of game that concerned, well, shots.

"No thank you," I declined politely, proceeding to look for Edward again. But he was now completely out of sight; the crowd had engulfed him.

"Come on Bella, don't be a fucking pussy." Tanya said, waving her long blonde hair about as she danced.

I glanced at her circle of cheerleader friends, and decided. _Tonight will be a night to be spent in order to forget_, I told myself, taking Tanya up on her offer. "Let's go." I said sternly. I wasn't going to back down like that from her and her popular clique so easily, and I wouldn't allow her or any of her friends to call me a pussy either.

As they made way in their circle to make room for me, I felt a bit uneasy. I knew what I was doing was wrong, and that I could only take so much alcohol in one night. But I also wasn't going to allow myself to be ridiculed by a bunch of popular kids. I was taking them up on their offer, and that was that.

-v-

I've taken a total of five more shots, now ten all in all, if you count the ones that I took from the counter earlier. I tried to look for Alice, but she was nowhere to be found. I hoped that Jasper was here, but he still had the stomach flu. And Edward… where the hell was Edward?

"What's wrong Bella, pussying out?" Tanya called, laughing hysterically about God knows what. But ten shots of heavy alcohol was my limit. I felt woozy, and my head hurt like crazy as I attempted to stand up from the circle of people, making my way towards finding Alice, Emmett, or even yes, Edward.

I tried to stand again, but couldn't. My vision was getting hazy, and my consciousness starting to fall apart. Soon, I had no idea where I was, or what I was even doing, as I felt a pair of strong hands carry me up so I could stand. I felt a strange pang of comfort, and only one person could give me that kind of degree of security with just a single touch. Surely this must mean…

"Michael?" I smiled stupidly. And suddenly, boy was before me, and he was handsome. He was handsome as fuck. And surely nobody could be more handsome than Michael McConnell? Of course this was him.

I went over to the boy, staring directly into his emerald green eyes. A part of me screamed that Michael's eyes were almond, but this boy… he was so beautiful. I couldn't deny that. He smelled like coffee, and cigarettes, and it was wonderful. I wanted to drown in this boy, whoever he was.

"Heyyyy, Michaeeeeel," I greeted, holding the boy's chest.

"Bella," the boy started, and I felt lost in his husky, velvet-like voice. "It's me, it's Edward."

* * *

**Aww shit son**


	14. Us

**So it begins.**

**EPOV**

"Heyyyyyy, Michael," Bella said, her voice extremely slurred. One of the people in the party bumped into her, and her chest collided with mine. I quickly held her shoulders to straighten her up.

"Bella," I started, trying to get her to focus and sober up. "It's me. It's Edward,"

"I've missed you soooooo, so much Michael, do you know that? God, I'm so glad you're here…" Her voice trailed off. I could hear Tanya and her gang laughing from behind us, and I quickly give them a death glare. They glared back, and proceeded to laugh some more. I spotted Alice in the living room playing a game of shots with some of the popular kids, and Emmett was nowhere to be found. Great.

"Michaeeeeeel," Bella cried, almost laughing. "Come on Michael, let's daaaaaance," she shouted, as she dragged me in the middle of the makeshift dancefloor. More of the people who were sober enough laughed at her.

I tried to straighten her up again. "Bella, listen to me. You need to get home. I'll drive you, okay? You need to get yourself some coffee, and some sleep."

"As long as I sleep next you," she laughed again, twirling her fingers around my chest.

I felt my face go red as I blushed as red as Rudolph's nose, and I could feel a hammering in my head that signified that my ears were going pink again.

Suddenly, Mike Newton came to view and grabbed Bella by the wrist, not meeting my eyes.

"Get out of my house, asshole." I said sternly, and I gave him another death glare until it finally registered to his drunken self that it was me he was talking to, the guy who almost beat him to a pulp.

He raised both his hands defensively and backed away. "Sorry," he mouthed, looking terrified, and he disappeared into the crowd.

"Don't take me homeeee, Michael," Bella slurred. I was now holding her up with one of her arms on my shoulders, as she could barely stand from all the shots that Tanya and the others made her take. "My mom and Jasper will kill me," she continued, her eyes starting to close and her body slumping over. She was beginning to pass out.

_You know what? Fuck it._

I quickly grabbed her under the knees and scooped her up, holding her against my arms. The people who saw us stopped on their tracks as they eyed me and Bella, but went on dancing again after a few moments. With Bella now half-asleep and mumbling in my arms, I made my way towards the stairs and into my room, where two people were heavily kissing on my bed. _Fuck. I should have locked the goddamn door,_ I thought to myself.

"Out. Get out, now." I said, still carrying Bella in my arms. I guess I was terrifying enough as the couple quickly dashed out into the hallway and looked for another spot to touch each other.

As I made it further inside my room and towards the bed, I softly laid Bella down and took her shoes off. Her socks had a cute animal print on them and I smiled at how adorable they looked on her. I began to put my comforter around her, as I felt it was too cold for her to just be wearing nothing but the blouse on her back.

"I forgive you, Michael," she mumbled, her back against the bed, eyes closed.

Without thinking, I replied, barely a whisper. "Forgive me for what?"

"For hitting me the other day, when we fought before your accident..."

I gasped, looking at her in shock. Then, without a moment's notice, her eyes slowly began to open and she quickly sat up from the bed, squinting, and I turned on my lamp. Her face was still red from the alcohol intake.

"Bella?" I whispered.

Suddenly, she put her hands over her mouth, scurried out of my sheets, and ran towards my bathroom door. _Shit._ She was vomiting. I followed suit and spotted her kneeling against the toilet, trying desperately to keep her hair away from her face as she let it all out. I knelt down beside her and helped her.

"Here, let me," I said, and her eyes darted towards mine as she let go of her hair. I held it into place behind her neck, some of the strands escaping from my grasp.

After what seemed like forever, she finally flushed the toilet and closed the rim, her head against the seat. I went out of the bathroom to get the bottle of water I'd kept from yesterday out of my Jansport, and handed to her.

"The water's a day old, so it's not cold" I warned. "But I don't think there's any harm in that,"

She turned to look at me after washing her mouth with the water and spitting it out back into the toilet, and the big, brown orbs of her eyes looked apologetic and remorseful.

"I'm so sorry, Edward," she said, and I could tell she was sobering up, although her face was still as red as strawberries. I held her hand unknowingly, and she took my fingers with hers.

But as soon as I realized what I was doing, I pretended that it was a gesture to help her get up, and she went along with it. We both stood from the bathroom tiles, and made our way back to the bed.

"I can still take you home, you know," I began, my voice trailing off.

'I—" she began. "Jasper and my mom will be furious. And I kinda told them I'd be sleeping here tonight, with Alice. I didn't tell them it was going to be a party."

I sighed.

Out of nowhere, tears began to fill her eyes, which started to glow as red as her face. She ran towards my bed, and buried her face deep in my pillows. She started coughing, and sobbing.

"I'm so sorry," she said, her face still in the pillows, not facing me. "I'm sorry I hated you and pushed you around when we first met, and I'm so sorry for earlier," she cried. I didn't know what else to do but to comfort and protect her tonight. I helped her sit up as I gave her an embrace, the first that I've ever given her, and she hugged me back tightly, cried on my chest, and I hushed her as I rocked her back and forth, smoothing out her chestnut hair.

"Shh, it's okay." I said. "It'll be alright,"

"Please don't tell anyone that Michael hit me," she cried out, my shirt now covered with her tears. "I promised him I would never tell anyone, I promised…"

I closed my eyes tightly, Bella still locked in my arms. "I won't tell anyone, not a soul. I promise."

She sniffed, and slowly pried herself out of my arms. We looked at each other for the longest time, in silence. "Please promise me," she said, holding out her hand, creating a fistbump.

I held out my hand and slapped it against her knuckles, forming another one of our fist fives. Only this time, I didn't let go. I smoothed out her reddened knuckles with my thumb, and before I knew it, our fingers intertwined. My heart started to thump fast, but it was a good kind of thumping. I never wanted the feeling to end, and knowing that Bella probably wasn't over Michael and probably never will be, this was possibly the farthest she and I will ever go.

She tucked a piece of my hair underneath my ear, and she stared at me for what felt like hours, as did I to her. Our fingers were still intertwined, my thumb still comforting her.

"Edward?" she suddenly said. I could see her eyes glimmering in the darkness of my room, my little lamp the only source of light.

"Yes?" I answered.

And out of nowhere, I felt her leaning in, and I was doing the same. Her pink, pink lips pressed themselves softly against mine, and before I knew it, I was drowning in her mouth, and in my mind I praised her delicious strawberry scent, her chestnut hair, her big, brown eyes. Everything.

* * *

**Reviews, yes? :3**


	15. Chapter 15

**BPOV**

I woke with a start, suddenly blinking my eyes open, forcefully. I had no idea where I was.

Sitting up, I let my surroundings sink in. I was met with the gray walls of the room, certain that they weren't the purple ones I had in my own. The ceiling was higher than mine, and on the table beside the bed stood a small lamp that had been left on over the night. It glowed a dim, orange glow against the lack of the sun that the misty weather had bought upon where I assumed was still Forks, Washington. The curtains of the room were drawn, a few patches of faint light from outside seeping in.

My head throbbing, I began to try and recall the events from the night before. I remembered lights. There had been lights, and music. "Yes," I heard myself mutter under my breath. "There was a party last night..." I said as I begin to lightly smooth out my hair.

The throbbing in my head helped me piece two and two together, and I remembered having taken in an intense amount of alcohol that my body wasn't capable of tolerating. I remembered taking up Tanya's offer to play a game of shots with her and the popular kids, and after that, my mind came to a complete blank as I tried to recall what else I had done.

But I still hadn't answered the question I'd asked myself in the first place: _Where the fuck was I?_

Suddenly, as if on cue, I felt a weight shift beside me on the bed, the sheets moving as the weight had. And as I eyed this person whose back was facing me, I began to remember, slowly, but surely.

I was in the Cullens' home.

I remembered almost passing out in the makeshift dance floor the previous night, but the words that came out of my mouth, I couldn't recollect for the life of me. But then someone had taken care of me, aided me in my sorry, drunken state and brought me up to this room, where I must have completely passed out. And as fragments of memories from last night slowly came back to me, I felt my mouth suddenly dangle open, now registering exactly where this room was and who I was with.

Again, I shifted my eyes to the person beside me, and was met with the bronze hair and pale skin I had grown to care about over the past few weeks. It was Edward, sound asleep, the sheets entangled against his legs.

And the moment I recognized that it was Edward who was asleep next to me on this bed, bigger chunks of memories from last night finally revealed themselves. It was Edward who had carried me up to his room; it was Edward who offered to drive me home last night, but I had refused in a pathetic, drunken haze for fear of how furious my family would have been if they had seen me in the state that I was in last night. It was Edward who softly, carefully, and selflessly laid me in his bed and tucked me in, and it was Edward who had pulled my hair back when I ran towards the bathroom to expel the alcohol from my mouth. And it was Edward who—

_Oh God. _

I quickly pressed three of my fingers against my lips, feeling them. It can't be. I couldn't have possibly done such a thing.

With a start, Edward suddenly began to blink his eyes open, also seemingly unaware of where he was and who he was with. But the moment everything had registered to him, he untangled the sheets from his legs and shot up as quickly as I did when I awoke, and looked at me with wide eyes filled with anxiety. His green eyes reflected an intense fear that only confirmed the worst of my fears from last night. I kept my fingers where they were, planted against my lips, now stuck in a stupor.

"Bella," he breathed deeply, his breaths now fast and unsteady. He looked like he had absolutely no words to say as much as I knew he wanted to speak. Finally, after what seemed like hours, he opened his mouth, stammering in a nervous manner. "Bella, I'm so sorry. Last night, I—I didn't mean what I did. I—I didn't know what to do, you just leaned in and it just _happened",_ he began, and as he did, I all but sat still in the same position, sitting up with eyes wide, my fingers still placed on my lips. "…But I swear that's all. That's all that happened." He continued. He was sweating now, his hands shaking as he waved them around while he explained, a nervous wreck. "I'm—I'm so sorry." He went on. "Please don't be mad, I really didn't mean anything, I swear—"

And I did. I believed him. It was not his doing- It was mine. It was me who had leaned in. Me who grasped his auburn hair with such gusto as I kissed his neck, his lips, and pressed his tongue against mine. It was me who praised every inch of him, his emerald eyes and his pale skin. And it was me who had fallen asleep beside him, not even giving him enough time to react and register what had happened before he had fallen asleep, as well. It was me. It was all me. It had only been a month, and I betrayed Michael. I had already betrayed him, completely.

"N-no," I said, breaking out of my stupor. "It was me. It's my fault. I'm—I'm sorry. I was drunk. I didn't mean to—I'm sorry. I can't—" The words that came out of my mouth seemed useless and unpieced, and as I felt my salty, traitor tears as they streamed down my face, I did the best thing I could do when faced with problems I couldn't bear to handle: I ran.

I removed the sheets from my legs, put on my shoes, and started to head towards the door.

"Wait!" Edward said loudly, grabbing my left wrist. "Are you mad? Please. Please don't be mad." He begged. He looked at me with intense remorse in his bright, green eyes.

I wanted to seek solace in him, seek comfort. Edward had become one of my friends over the weeks, one of nicest and most sincere I have met in a long, long while. He had protected me and kept me safe in my hour of need, and he had helped me feel okay again… more than okay, since the accident. But I couldn't. I couldn't find the protection that I wanted from Edward, because I had now betrayed Michael. I had betrayed him. I quickly pried my wrist away from Edward's grasp, and looked him straight in the eye, tears still streaming down. I shook my head.

"Please don't touch my like this again." I said, trying to sound stern, but still crying. I felt my voice shake as I said these words that I told myself that I meant. But I couldn't stay here anymore. I felt repulsive, and I wanted to turn back time so badly, but I knew I couldn't. I will never be able to.

"Good-bye, Edward." I felt my voice shake once more, tears now flowing from my face more violently than before.

And with that, I quickly made my way out the door, past the hallway, down the stairs, and out of the house in a second.

**EPOV**

I felt two pairs of feet running, but one pair was fading away, and the other, getting closer.

"Edward!" Alice yelled, her head now sticking out of my door. Both footsteps were gone. There was a loud bang as I felt the front door close with a thud. Bella had left the house.

Alice's eyes looked frantic, filled with worry. Her head was still sticking out of the door, and I nodded, very slowly, to gesture that she was allowed to come in."What the hell happened?" she cried. "Bella just stormed out of the house crying and-" she walked briskly towards me, and I felt myself freeze, sitting on the bed, my hands almost dead on my lap. _What the hell just happened?_

"Edward," Alice began, slapping my face lightly. "Edward, what's wrong? Tell me what happened."

At Alice's touch, I felt myself become mobile again, coming back to reality, leaving my jumbled thoughts.

"She just… she was mad. She—she left. I couldn't do anything and I—" I felt an intense degree of guilt swallow me whole, and I felt so terrible that I almost wanted to cry. My eyes glassed up a bit, and I felt a pang in my chest. I felt hurt.

"What happened?" Alice repeated, looking at me sternly.

I buried my face in both my hands, mumbling. "She was drunk last night. I wanted to take her home but she said Jasper and her mom would be furious. I took her up here and took care of her and we— we kissed. I kissed her, Alice." I said, my right hand now on my forehead, and I could feel it heat up in frustration.

"You _what?_" yelled Alice, both hands now over her mouth. "Edward, you _know_ what happened to her. You know what happened. Why the hell—"

"She leaned in. She just leaned in. I couldn't stop her, and I wanted to. She—God, Alice, she… she smelled like strawberries. She always smells like strawberries. She held my hand and I wanted to hold it forever. And she just leaned in and I couldn't stop myself—I knew it was wrong, I know I shouldn't have, but I couldn't. I'm such an idiot…"

I hit my palm against my forehead. "Stupid, stupid, stupid." I yelled, over and over until Alice stopped me, locking me in an embrace.

"I just… I just wanted to make things right. I just wanted to take care of her. But I ruined it. I completely ruined it. I ruined everything." I felt myself rubbing my fingers against my temples, trying to ease the frustration out. Alice gently rubbed my back, shushing me.

"I should go after her… I want to apologize. I didn't mean it. I shouldn't have—God I'm so _stupid,_" I said, still rubbing my temples, hoping it would help. It didn't.

"She needs space, Edward. You told me that." Alice said, and as I realized this, I knew she was right. If I had run after Bella, she would feel more pressured, uncomfortable, confused. I didn't want that. She had suffered through enough. But I wanted to make things right so badly…

"What do I do, Alice?" I begged for answer. "What do I do?"

"You wait." Alice patiently said, holding both my hands tightly. "You just wait. There's nothing else you can do, Edward."

I pried my hands away from hers and sank down under my sheets. I suddenly felt hopeless, but determined. If waiting was the only solution towards regaining the short friendship I shared with Bella, then I was willing to. I would wait. I would wait a lifetime.


	16. Chapter 16

**Again, like the rest of the chapters before this, Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight and all related characters. I only play around.**

**BPOV**

School the following week was the epitome of a waking nightmare.

Lunch came by, and as much as I had wanted to sit next to Edward and his siblings, I knew I couldn't for the life of me. I had shunned Edward away the previous weekend; I told him good-bye. And as images from that cold, rainy morning began to linger in my thoughts, I remembered the look on Edward's face, how he had pleaded that I not be mad at him. But I was baffled myself—I didn't know what to feel. I was the one who leaned in, I started it. Therefore I should be madder at myself than him, right? And maybe I was. Maybe I was angrier at the fact that it was me who started it all. But he kissed me back. He didn't pull back, he didn't stop me. So what the hell does that mean?

And so I said goodbye, and although it felt wrong, although I wanted to keep my friendship with Edward badly, I couldn't. It wasn't the right thing to do. I had betrayed Michael, so saying goodbye was the right thing to do, wasn't it? But _shit_. I felt like that goodbye was absolute, like it would last ten thousand lifetimes.

Snapping out of my thoughts and coming back to reality, I decided that instead of sitting next to the Cullens like I hoped I always would, I opted for my second choice, which was to sit with my old friends, with Mike Newton now absent from the table (I hoped permanently). I spotted his long, drawling face next to Tanya and some of the other popular kids from across the room, and he gave me a disgusting wink that I had chosen to ignore. I looked the other way instead, and unknowingly, I began to dig my fingers on the nails of my left hand, picking them again, uneasy.

As I sat down and began to eat my tray of horrid cafeteria food, my friends were quiet, especially Angela (who I had heard was present at the Cullens' party, although I didn't bump into her that weekend). She must have witnessed what happened between me and Edward, and judging by her silence, I knew it was taking her an immense amount of willpower to not ask me about it, knowing it would make me feel more uncomfortable.

I couldn't handle this atmosphere any longer.

Gathering my things and leaving the tray behind, I started to sit up.

"Bella, where are you going?" Angela asked, the look of concern evident on her features.

"The Cullens' table probably," Erik scoffed as he rolled his eyes. Tyler, another one of our friends in our semi-large group, laughed.

"I wanted to head over there too, actually. But I'm scared of Alice's brothers. Bella doesn't seem to be, though, judging from last Saturday's little incident…" Lauren giggled, covering her mouth with her hand. She must have been at the party too, but I was probably too drunk to notice.

I sighed. "I'm going to the library, for your information." I said truthfully, lightly kicking my chair back in its place. My so-called friends, with the exception of Angela, began to get on my nerves.

"Right. _The library_." Lauren laughed, making mock quotation marks in the air. "She's probably going to follow Edward, for all we know." She snickered. I suddenly noticed that Edward was now gone from Alice and Emmett's table, nowhere to be found. He must have left.

Angela suddenly gave Lauren a glare, and I was eternally grateful, because this made her shut up. I wondered how Alice could put up with Lauren, especially whenever she acted like this. I could feel hot air coming out of my nostrils.

"Actually, Bella, you wouldn't mind if I joined, would you?" Angela asked, still glaring at Lauren and the others.

I smiled, nodding. "Sure, not at all." And we both began to head towards the cafeteria's double doors and towards the library building.

**EPOV**

I couldn't stand sitting here like an idiot with Bella from across the room, having to face her asshole friends.

Rumors have been spreading around the campus like wildfire ever since we've gotten back to school on Monday, after the party. People began to quote "congratulate" me for _apparently_ banging Bella the other night, the clearly off-limits, uncharted territory girl that she was. One of her so-called friends, Tyler Crowley, offered me a fistbump in History that I refused to take after he stated how I finally got to his friend, Bella, "the ultimate trophy". I wanted to spit in his face. Not caring to explain as none of these people were worth my time, I decided to walk it off after class ended and completely ignored them. I had a hunch that the party was a bad idea. Emmett definitely needed another outlet for his loneliness.

Whatever good impression I had of the people here in Forks High began to evaporate into thin air. Tight-knit school my ass. Oh, they were tight-knit, alright. Everybody knew everyone, and everyone knew everyone else's business. They made sure of that. And they were almost just like any other shitty high school out there. I realized all of this as I sat up and started to get my things and make my way out of the cafeteria, not bearing to see Bella sit with those assholes and not being able to do anything about it.

"And where do you think you're going?" Alice asked, sighing deeply. "You can't just keep walking away like this, Edward. I know last Saturday's party was a mistake, but you can't just—"

"I can't just what?" I said under my breath, although sternly. "I can't stay here. I need a drag. I need one. Now."

Alice sighed yet again. "The back building is off limits to you Edward, you know that," she said, leaning forward. I could tell it was taking a lot out of her to not stand up and drag me back into my seat.

"I'm not stupid, Alice. I'm not going there. There's bound to be other places here." I said, gathering my stuff. And without looking back, I slung my Jansport on my right shoulder and proceeded towards the double doors that led me out of the cafeteria. Bella barely even looked as I stormed out. I guess she was sticking to the goodbye she gave me during Sunday morning. I felt a pang of pain in my chest, but quickly brushed it off, remembering the advice that Alice had given me on that same day: I had to wait. And I gave Bella the unspoken promise that I would wait as long as it took for her to open up to me again.

I decided I would take a drag on the bleachers, where I'm sure no one would have been at, at this hour. Football practice for the athletes didn't start until late in the afternoon, if I could recall correctly. I went out of one of the main doors that led outside instead of the hidden beige one that Bella usually took to go to the back building, and in a few minutes, I was up on the bleachers, lighting yet another drag. I eyed the back building and wondered if Bella would be there, if she ever got tired of her asshole friends. Maybe she would be there with Angela. She was the only one who I would guess hasn't been a total dick to Bella recently. I'd spotted her at the party last Saturday, and she was completely sober, sitting in the corner of the house with the other designated sober drivers. I assumed she'd been one of the people who witnessed me carry Bella up to my bedroom, but I hoped she was nice enough to not think of it any other way. I didn't do anything to Bella. I just wanted her safe and out of that party, and that was that.

I inhaled another drag and looked up at the sky and closed my eyes for a minute, wanting to relax, but images from Sunday morning, when I woke up next to Bella sitting on my bed, came emerging out of nowhere.

"_Please don't touch me like this again,"_ she said, her voice ringing in my ears. I began to slouch, my hands on my forehead, rubbing my temples again in order to calm myself down. "You're such an idiot, Edward." I muttered under my breath. "Such a fucking idiot." I repeated over and over until I calmed myself a bit.

"Not really," a voice said from behind.

The voice sounded strangely familiar, but I couldn't be too sure if it was who I guessed. I turned around, and I was faced with long, dark brown hair matching brown glasses. It was Angela. She was alone.

"I take it you saw what happened, as well…" I trailed off, looking at the distance. Angela sat beside me and gave me a friendly pat on the shoulder. "You must think of me differently now,"

Angela only chuckled. "I know what I saw, and I almost believed it. But I know Bella's side too, Edward. She and I talked. I don't judge too quickly. That's one important thing you have to know about me. I take what everyone says into account." She suddenly grabbed her backpack, opened it, and began fumbling around in one of the pockets. She took out a pack of menthols, put one against her mouth, and offered me a stick.

"You smoke?" I asked, dumbfounded.

"Only when I'm stressed out," she laughed, lighting the stick in between her lips. "Our friends are being dicks today, and Bella and I decided to head towards the library to be away from them for a while. Until she asked for some alone time, herself." Angela laughed. "Anyway, smoking, it's a terrible habit. I want to quit so bad."

I took the stick she that she was still offering me, and put it between my lips as well. I grabbed my lighter and lit up the cigarette. The menthol felt nice and cool in my mouth, but I cursed myself in the head for taking another stick. This had been my third for today.

"This vice will be the death of me," I said, blowing out the smoke. "I wish I could stop, as well,"

"Amen to that." Angela said as she offered me a high-five, and I suddenly remembered me and Bella's fist-fives. I felt another strange pang in my chest. My open palm lightly collided with Angela, and there was suddenly a silence between us, although it was a comfortable one between friends.

"You like her," she suddenly said matter-of-factly, blowing the smoke out of her mouth. "I've seen how you look at her. You can't keep those eyes off of Bella for even a second."

I sighed heavily, breaking the quiet around us, now looking at Angela. "Is it that obvious?" I asked.

She nodded, laughing. "I'm afraid so, buddy."

Groaning and taking another drag from the cigarette that she had offered me, I sighed for the nth time. "What do I do, Angela?" I pleaded.

"She needs space right now, Edward. It's going to take a while. And I think you would know what she'll need to overcome what she's going through. She needs time."

Angela was right. I already knew. There was only one thing I could do, and that was to wait, like Alice said. I couldn't force Bella into anything she didn't want. I didn't want to hurt or pressure her.

I began to put out the cigarette with the sole of my sneaker. "I just want her to be happy again, you know? She doesn't deserve what she's going through."

"Nobody does," Angela continued, sadly. "Especially not her. She's such a special girl, Bella. She needs all the love she can get, but at the same time she can give all that love back as well. She can give it back tenfold."

I fell silent, admiring Bella even more. She didn't know it yet, but she was getting stronger. I could it feel it in my bones. She could get through all of this bullshit, someday.

"D-do you think…" I began, starting to stutter, wondering why I even started to ask. "Do you think I have a chance, Angela?"

She became silent, but spoke after a couple of seconds.

"It'll take time, and a lot of it," she said, putting out her cigarette as well. "But you know, I think you do." She smiled. "I have a strong feeling that you do."

I smiled back at her, thankful, and looked at my watch. As soon as I realized what time it was, I began to collect my things and stand up. "I'm sorry, but I have World Lit in a while, third period. What about you?"

"I'll stay here. I have a two-hour break, and as my friends are being assholes right now, I'd rather be alone, to be honest." She laughed.

I wondered why she'd mentioned this a couple of times since we started talking, but I decided to stay out of it instead. "I'll see you then," I said, and gave her another high five. She slapped my hand back. "I'll see you! And don't tell Bella about my little habit," she said, pointing to her pack of menthols. "She'll kill me if she ever finds out."

"I won't," I said, giving Angela a friendly smile as I began to descend the stairs to the football field and back to the main building. I grinned to myself as I finally found another reason to stop smoking, as well.


	17. Chapter 17

**Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight and all related characters.**

* * *

**BPOV**

"Slut," the person I bumped into laughed as I began to pick up my things from the ground. I didn't know who he was, but he looked familiar, and I guessed that he was at the party last Saturday. I felt tears well up in my eyes, and I wanted to explain. I wanted to explain what happened so badly; I almost wanted to gather everyone in a crowd and tell them what happened. It was not what they thought. Nothing happened between me and Edward that night.

But the better part of me knew that doing that wouldn't be worth my time at all. I shouldn't feel sorry for myself like this. Nothing happened. I knew that. And that was enough.

I turned around, gave him a cold glare, and raised my middle finger to his face. He and his friend responded with mocking "oooh's" and went their merry way.

Wanting to punch them but knowing what was better of me, I turned my back on them and proceeded towards class. I had decided, for some reason, that I wouldn't let the opinion of these people (who didn't have any idea what even took place in Edward's room at the party, in the first place,) to slow me down. I was having none of this. I did what I did best instead, and bit off the remnants of my fingernails again. I could taste blood in my mouth, but I didn't mind. This was my only way of coping with the anxiety that wanted to engulf me so badly.

The rest of the day at school was nothing short of terrible, as people began whispering each time I passed by. I was met with stares from inside the classrooms I went in, and the familiarity of it all made me even more anxious, reminding me of how people reacted when they had heard that Michael passed, and when they had probably heard that I attempted to kill myself. While my trigonometry teacher went on with the lecture in class, I decided to brush all of this off and concentrated on the raindrops again,which were starting to pour on the window next to my desk. One. Two. Three. Four. Seven. Eight. Nine. I calmed down immediately.

When school was over, I sent Jasper a text that said I was in the parking lot already, and when he came, he was with Emmett, his fellow senior. Jasper went inside the car and started the engine while I was left with Emmett, who gave me a short "we're sorry about last Saturday". I smiled at him and said nothing, and he had a sad look on his face as Jasper and I drove off out of the parking lot and into the distance.

It was silent in the car again, as usual. We weren't always like this, Jasper and I. Our rare car rides used to be filled with laughter and easy conversation, whenever I didn't take the bus with Michael. Now the rides were awkward and quiet, and this pained me to no end. Did Japser not realize that I was still the same sister he had always had, in spite of what happened? Did he not realize he could still joke around with me, laugh with me? I was so tired of all the tension, and upset that I couldn't do anything about it.

"I heard about what happened last Saturday," Jasper suddenly said, breaking the silence. My jaw almost dropped to the floor. Of course he found out. Word about what happened spread in school like wildfire, and with people all around campus kept calling me horrible things like "slut", of course word would have reached Jasper.

"You said you were having a sleepover with Alice." He said. He looked angry, but kept his eyes on the road all the same.

"I- I was." I lied.

Jasper caught me instantly. "Don't lie to me, Bells. Tell me what happened. I want to hear it from you." He said sternly, his grip tight on the steering wheel.

Deciding that it was best not to lie anymore, I told Jasper the truth. "I got drunk. I got so drunk and almost passed out and—"

"You let Emmett's brother take advantage of you just like that?" Jasper fumed. He was definitely angry.

"Shut up, Jasper. You said you wanted to hear it from me, and here it is. Nothing happened. He carried me up to his room to nurse me back sober. I was making a fool out of myself out there, and he needed to get me out." I was starting to breathe unevenly, angry that Jasper had almost believed everything that everyone at school said. "How the hell do you think he would've tried to help me, Jasper? Did you want him to help me get sober in the middle of the dance floor?" I continued, now angry, myself. "He just wanted to help, Jasper. And I swear, that's all he did. If anything it was my fault that I'd gotten that drunk in the first place, and I was lucky Edward was there or else I would've passed out in the crowd with everyone stepping on my face."

"If you're so grateful to him, Bella, then why have you been ignoring him, and Alice, and Emmett the whole day? Emmett's my friend, too, Bella. I know these things. I'm not stupid." Jasper said, looking at me. He had now stopped the car in the middle of the open road and parked it aside.

I didn't know what to say. Could I tell Jasper what happened? Should I?

He was looking at me, his eyes filled with worry that his assumptions were correct, that Edward had done something to me. But he didn't. Edward did nothing. He did nothing.

"Because I kissed Edward. " I began. "I kissed him, Jasper. I was sober, but I didn't think. I just leaned in, and I kissed him. I didn't want to face the consequences of what I did. I'm practically cheating on Michael, Jasper. I'm cheating. I ran home and told Edward good-bye. I don't want to speak to him anymore."

Jasper was still looking me in the eye. "But you want to, don't you?" he said, almost a statement and less of a question.

I fell silent. Did I?

Jasper started the engine, and turned the car around away from the direction that led back home.

"Where are we going?" I asked, looking back, eyeing the trees that were landmarks that we were near home. They disappeared quickly into the distance.

"We're going to your favorite place. We can't talk about these things with mom around." He said, throwing me his phone. "Text her. Tell her we're heading to Port Angeles to buy some supplies for a science project. You can't possibly screw up lying through text." He winked, although he was still serious as we drove off.

We made a few turns and a few detours because of on-going construction, but after half an hour or so, we finally made it to my favorite place.

The sea.

Jasper and I both opened our doors as we parked our car along the road, and I quickly kicked my shoes off and ran towards the sand, the feeling comfortably overwhelming from under my soles. Jasper followed suit, taking his shoes and jacket off as well. I always had happy memories here by the sea. This was a happy place.

Jasper was carrying the purple polka-dotted blanket that he'd always kept at the back of his car for me, and he laid it down on the sand as we sat down. The sun was almost setting. The sight of it was absolutely stunning, and beautiful.

After a comfortable amount of silence, Jasper finally spoke. "So, do you?" He asked, playing with the sand with his fingers.

"Do I what?" I asked, drawing patterns on the sand with my hands as well.

"You know what I'm talking about, Bells." He sighed." You still want him around, Edward. I can feel it. I've seen you two around campus at least once. I know you want him around."

I fell silent. I didn't want to answer Jasper's questions because I didn't know the answers myself. Did I want Edward around? Maybe. But what would that mean? Would that mean I had forgotten about Michael?

"When was the last time you had a good dream about him, Bella? About Michael?" he said softly, as if he knew he had to ask me this question someday soon.

I was silent again, but finally answered. "Two weeks ago," I said. "I'd dreamt that we were at the back building again, and that he was singing to me, playing with his guitar. It was wonderful."

"It's been more than month…" Jasper trailed off.

"It has," I replied, just so the atmosphere wouldn't be tense. "I still think about him."

"But how are you holding up?" Jasper asked. "I miss you, Bella. More than you could possibly imagine. More than anyone. But you need time. Your therapist told me and mom that you need more time, and space. And I hope I'm giving you the right amount, but I miss you so much all the same." He said. His voice was beginning to thicken up, and I could tell that he was holding his tears back.

I put my arm around his shoulder and patted him twice, hoping to comfort him.

"Somebody told me recently that they believed I would be okay someday. Maybe not today, they said. But someday." I looked at the waves as I dug my toes deeper in the sand. The thought of those words gave me comfort, and I was amazed at how I held on to these words, like I was holding on to them for my life.

"Well, I'm sure Edward was right." Jasper looked at me, and smiled. I was dumbfounded. How could he have possibly known?

"A brother's instinct," he said, as if he'd read my mind. "He's good for you, Bells. I know it. Alice and I talked." At this, I began to be even more dumbfounded, and I could tell Jasper almost read my mind again. When did Jasper and Alice ever talk? Do they talk regularly now? But he went on ahead. "I know you regret locking lips with the dude, but it's alright, Bella. I know you didn't mean to do it, you were just sobering up, after all. And I'm sure he didn't mean it either," he continued. "We can't all hold on to the past forever. We have to move forward, to newer, better things. I'm not saying you have to do it right now, all I'm asking is you give whatever it is you two have—your friendship—a shot."

I breathed out heavily. "It's just that… I get this feeling," I said, my voice barely a whisper. Jasper had to lower his head closer to mine to hear what I was saying. "I get this feeling every time I'm with Edward... that everything's going to be okay. And it feels wrong at the same time. I feel like I'm betraying Michael."

"I'm sure Michael would only want you to keep being okay, Bella." Jasper smiled. "I'm sure he won't mind the slightest if Edward was the key to that."

"But what if he does? What if he does mind, Jasper? I don't know what to _do_ anymore!" I cried, feeling my tears flow down my face again. I wanted to stop all of this nonsense crying, I wanted to stop all of these useless feelings of guilt. But I couldn't. All I could do for now was to succumb to it.

Jasper held me tightly. "We both knew Michael well enough. I know he used to have his bad days, but he always meant well. And I know he would only want to make you happy, no matter what the cost."

I cried into Jasper's shirt, his words echoing in my ears and digging down deep into my heart.

He was right.

I couldn't hold on to the past forever. And the more tears I released, the more I began to realize that I did—I did want to give my friendship with Edward another shot. Upon the epiphany, I smiled against Jasper's chest, my tears now drying, and decided that the next time I see Edward, I would fix everything. I would talk to him again.


	18. Chapter 18

**PLEASE READ: For the few older readers that I have, I've made some minor changes to some of the previous chapters in grammar and spelling. I've also added a couple of lines or two and deleted some that I felt were unnecessary to the story, so please bear with me! I'm fixing things in the hope of making this story better for the readers. Hearts.**

**Special shout out to my best friend and semi-beta, Madie (paintingwithlight) for her undying support, lalala-love, and bamf-ness. Hi if you're reading this, gago. I heart u. Alululululululululululu.**

**Another special shout out to my favorite cousin (lol) Justine because she semi-betas my chapters like a pro as well. Hi Atin. Gaga ka. Like Lady Gaga. I love ur peys.**

**As always, Stephenie Meyer owns all of Twilight and its related characters. This one is a bit shorter than the others!**

* * *

The next two days were almost long and dragging, spent on daily routines of taking quick showers, getting dressed, and making my way to the kitchen to grab another of my mom's special iced coffee from the refrigerator. We would always wake up a bit late, Alice, Emmett, and I, and so I would regularly ask Alice to hurry up because she always hitched rides with me, and when she wouldn't respond to my pleas, I would drag her by the wrist to my car, to which she would respond, on the other hand, by hitting me hard at the back of my head.

I had no idea what to expect that week, keeping my promise to Bella and myself that I would wait until she came around, until she was ready. I was in no rush at all, but at the same time, I couldn't lie to myself and say that the past few days that came by were nice. They were as mundane as the grays skies of Forks' weather, which was almost the same at any given day. There would be times when I would think I would catch Bella smiling at me, but I would brush it off, telling myself that it was impossible, that it was likely too soon for her to be making any contact with me. She had just said good-bye on Sunday morning, and it was only Wednesday. I was probably only being delusional.

Thursday came by, and I dreaded Marine Biology like a plague. This would mean I would have to sit in the same room with Bella, and that there were possibilities of awkward interaction. And I was right. For this week's lecture, Dr. Rohan had paired the two of us up, Bella and I, deeming us research partners for the next two weeks.

I froze on the spot as she announced me and Bella's names, drawing them out from little slips of paper from a fishbowl that contained the class list. My eyes widened, although I hoped subtly. I felt my heart hammering in my chest, and I cursed whatever gods might be for making the situation harder than it already was. I promised I would wait, but how would I be able to execute my plan properly if Bella and I were going to spend the next two weeks working together?

Bella suddenly walked forward slowly, and as she came nearer and nearer, she gave me a small smile, I noticed that she smelled of strawberries again. But still frozen on the spot, all I did was gape at her back in reply to her unspoken greeting.

"Hi," she said, and it almost sounded more like a question, a small smile still playing around her lips. God, I missed that voice. "I won't… I won't bite." She said. It seemed like she was a bit nervous too, but not nearly half as much as I was, I had guessed.

"H-hi," I stammered, biting my lower lip nervously. "Do you want to switch with someone else…?"

"No!" Bella said immediately, and I was taken by surprise. Did she just say what I think she said?

"I mean…" she continued, now blushing and looking at her feet. Her smile was gone. I guessed that she was embarrassed, and I wanted to tell her it would be okay, but I remembered my promise. I would wait. And I assumed now more than ever that it probably was not the time.

"I mean…" she continued again, taking the seat next to mine. "We don't have to… _not_ talk. I mean…" she said again. "It's okay. It's okay with me now. I'm okay."

I wanted to believe her. I really did. But the way she was stammering all over the place told me that I probably shouldn't. "Are you sure?" I asked, not wanting to force anything on her. "We really could just switch with someone else. I could ask Dr. Rohan to—"

"I'm okay now, Edward." Bella reassured. I loved when she said my name. "I really am. My brother and I talked, and I talked it over with my therapist too, and… I don't want things weird between us anymore," she said, and she was now biting her lip as well. "I'm sorry for overreacting last weekend. I really am. I hoped we could start over, that is, if you forgive me…" her voice trailed off, and she sounded sad.

I chuckled back. "Forgive you? For what? I mean, I was the one who responded and did the stupid thing when I shouldn't have."

Her eyebrows furrowed. "No, _I_ did the stupid thing," she said, seeming a bit dumbfounded.

"I—" I started, but not wanting to argue. I guess she and I could meet each other halfway, then.

"We both did a stupid thing," I finally said, scratching the back of my head lightly. Bella laughed.

She nodded slowly in agreement, pursing her lips. "We did. We both did a stupid thing." And she laughed her musical laugh.

Bella held her hand out, gesturing for me to shake it, but I bumped it with my fist instead, hoping it wasn't too much that I reminded her of our fist-fives. She didn't seem to mind as she cupped her hand tightly against my knuckles.

"Let's be friends again, okay?" she asked as soon as I dropped my fist and she, her hand. Her brown eyes were almost glowing from under the loose strands of her hair.

"Okay," I smiled, and as Bella and I shook hands properly this time, I spotted Alice from across the large room, winking at me.

_Okay,_ I said to myself. _Maybe this week wouldn't have to turn out so bad after all._

I felt as though something inside my chest just did a motherfucking somersault.


	19. Chapter 19

**Meyer owns everything, yadda yadda yadda**

* * *

**BPOV**

As soon as Marine Biology was over, I checked myself in the girls' room, went ahead to the cafeteria, and got myself a plate of spaghetti and a can of orange soda. I was now ready for another fresh start with Edward, and set my tray down to the Cullens' table. I'd dragged Angela along with me, as the rest of our so-called friends were still being dickheads. Alice was nowhere to be seen, but Edward and Emmett were present at the table, talking about video games.

"Good to have you back," Emmett greeted, a smile stretched across his face. "And that orange soda looks a bit tempting, I'd better go get myself a can as well." He winked at Edward. "I'm sure you guys wouldn't mind the slightest."

"I'll tag along!" Angela exclaimed, and I guessed that she had already been acquainted with Emmett through Edward. It had already been around three weeks to a month since the Cullens moved back to Forks.

"So, uhm…" Edward began, playing with his food, sheepishly smiling. "You're here."

"I'm here," I smiled back, and chuckled a bit. It was great that I was friends with Edward again. I felt that same degree of comfort that was present every time I was with him, and I remembered what Jasper had said to me when we bonded at the beach at the start of the week: Michael would only want me to be okay again above anything else. And if Edward was the key to that, then so be it. I mean, it's not as if I liked him, right? I mean, sure, I thought he was extremely handsome, his pale skin and emerald green eyes standing out above all of the other fucked-up boys in Forks High. And he was kind, unlike the others. But that's all there was, wasn't it? That was all. I didn't like Edward.

Right?

His soft laugh snapped me out of my thoughts all of a sudden, and I came back to reality. "You're blushing," he said, teasing me. "You don't have to be shy, you know. I thought we were good now?" A smile played across his lips.

"It's… it's the weather," I stammered, lying, as soon as I realized that I was probably as red as a strawberry. "It happens all the time when there's a shift in the weather,"

Edward playfully raised an eyebrow. "It's been raining the whole week," he said.

Just then, as if I was saved by the bell, two pairs of hands suddenly set their trays on our table, and I gaped as I saw who their owners were.

"Scoot over, would you, Bells?" Jasper said. He was with Alice, and he had abandoned his usual table with his senior friends to sit with us. Jasper had been going on and on about her the past few days ever since our talk at the beach, and he wouldn't shut up about her since. This was the first time that I've actually seen them together.

"You're not sitting with Andrew and the others?" I asked, gesturing to his friends. Jasper looked at them, gave them a short wave, and the occupants of the other table responded the same way. "I'm sitting with Alice today. You guys don't mind, do you?"

Alice giggled. "Wait!" she said after whispering something in Edward's ear. "This is Jasper. He's—"

"My brother." I continued, rolling my eyes at him. "Jasper, this is Edward. He's my—" I hesitated for a bit before saying the word "friend". Was I allowed to call him that? "My Marine Biology research partner," I finished. And Edward rolled his eyes at me back.

"Her friend. I'm her friend, too." He laughed. He seemed to be almost ecstatic today, ever since I dropped my flimsy tray on the table. I wondered why. But all the same, I was glad to have gotten the confirmation. Edward and I were friends.

"He's my friend, yeah," I beamed. We've only known each other for a short while, but I already felt so drawn to him.

Edward and Jasper shook hands, and began eating. Emmett and Angela came back shortly, each with a can of orange soda at hand, and soon, the table was filled with merriment and laughter.

"…Oh boy, and when Edward locked himself out of the bathroom when he was five, that shit was priceless." Emmett boomed, laughing. I laughed along with them, and I felt so much at ease without even realizing it. Almost as if nothing had happened, like I regained my sanity.

"He didn't even have a freaking towel on!" Alice continued, and Edward had his hands on his forehead, his ears glowing a bright shade of pink.

Angela had to catch her breath, first, then asked. "Then what happened?"

"He was more worried that he'd permanently locked the bathroom door from inside than he was about being naked in the house. He ran crying to me and Alice and said mom would be furious," Emmett answered, lightly bumping Edward's shoulder with his fist. "Ease up, Ed. We're siblings. This is what siblings do!"

Edward shook his head mockingly and gave out a lof huff. He had a look of playful vengeance in his eyes, and began to share a story of his own.

"That one time Emmett freaked out while taking a photo with Santa Claus, though…." He said, wiggling his eyebrows at his brother. "Nothing can top that."

A roar of laughter emerged from the table as Alice grabbed her wallet from her bag and showed us an old Polaroid from the mess of pictures that was mixed up with her money; true enough, there was Emmett, around 6 to 7 years old, I would guess, wailing while sitting on the mall-Santa's lap.

And while everyone was busy laughing at the Cullen siblings' hysterics, I'd caught myself glancing over at Edward; the small wrinkles that formed around his eyes outlined his beautiful features, but he was laughing so hard he was almost squinting. It sounded like magic, and in a second, I realized that I myself was smiling, my cheeks feeling warm.

_Okay,_ I decided._ I could reject the statement that I was seeing Edward as more than my friend all I wanted, _I said to myself. But there was absolutely no denying that he was attractive.

As soon as the hysterics died down, everyone had to leave, and I realized that Edward and I both had classes at the third floor, which meant we would have to walk together again. I mean, that would be alright, surely? We were friends again now, after all.

We all said our short goodbyes and see-you-later's. I gave Japser, Alice, and Emmett tight hugs, and then lastly, Angela, who was heading off to the library to do some unfinished homework. They all went ahead, which left me and Edward fixing our things at the table.

"We uhm…" he began, a small smile still playing on his lips. I wished he would get rid of it; it looked wonderful on him. "We both have third period on the same floor, right?"

"Yes," I nodded, and slung my backpack over my shoulder. Edward did the same, and we were out through the double doors of the cafeteria in a second.

Edward broke the silence again as we reached the stairs. "Listen," he began, and I raised my eyebrows gesturing for him to continue. "Alice and I usually take jogs on Saturday mornings, back in Chicago…" he began. "But we haven't even exercised properly since we got here. I've been to the gym around twice, but that's it. The gym near home is kind of flimsy, but for some reason Emmett loves it there but I don't think I-"

"You want me to join you guys?" I asked abruptly, finishing his statement before he lengthened it further.

"Actually, I was going to ask if you _and _Jasper wanted to join. I mean, it's not—uhm, it's not going to be a double date or anything, don't worry about." I raised an eyebrow at this statement, but Edward continued. " It'll just be a sibling thing, you know? Then we can walk to the ice cream parlor and eat off everything we just burned afterwards," he laughed.

I flailed my hands in the air, jokingly. "What would be the point then?" I exclaimed, laughing along with him.

"It'll be fun, Bella. Trust me! Alice and I used to do this all the time in Chicago. Jog around, and if we felt like it, ice cream shop afterwards."

I sighed. "Fine," We were near my classroom now, and we began to slow down our walking. "I'll ask Jasper, too. He'd be up for it, I bet. As long as Alice will be there, he'll definitely tag along." I smiled.

"Alice has been babbling about your brother since they met, do you know that?" Edward replied.

I rolled my eyes and smiled. "Same here."

After a moment of comfortable silence, Edward broke in again. "Bella? I want to tell you something," he began, and I stood waiting patiently for him to open his mouth a second time. He continued after a few moments, seeming determined. "Emmett apologized to me for starting that party with a bunch of no-good crazy kids last Saturday. I told him to get better friends. And I don't—I don't want—I don't want you listening to what those bastards here in school have to say about you. You and I both know that nothing happened, okay? I know you know yourself. You're worth a hundred of them. A thousand, even." he said, his voice soft, but stern. And again, I was amazed at the amount of comfort Edward had given me— I felt as though I'd forgotten everything that happened in the past. "So if you hear anyone talking shit about what happened at the party last Saturday, and it makes you uncomfortable, I want you to tell me, and I'll deal with it."

We reached my History classroom and we stopped by the door, now looking at each other unknowingly. Edward was so kind to me, and I almost felt like I deserved none of it. I was so horrible to him the first time we had met.

"Well…" Edward began, snapping me out of my thoughts again. "I'll see you on Saturday, then?"

"We're not having lunch with the others tomorrow?" I slipped, suddenly feeling disappointed. All the same, I felt my heart skip a beat at the words Edward just said to me. He'll deal with it. He'll make things okay, and I trusted him.

Edward suddenly beamed. "We are!" He said quickly. "We are. I—I totally forgot, I'm sorry," he said, stammering again. I gave him a smile, and he reached out his hand, forming a fist bump. I slapped it against my palm. "I'll see you, alright?" he said. It suddenly felt a tad unfair to me that I gave Jasper and everyone else hugs before they left the cafeteria, but Edward was met with a measly fist-five instead, and he had given me such kind words just now. Was I ready, though? Was I ready for that? A hug?

_It's just a hug, Bella._

Snapping out of my thoughts, I realized that I was now gripping Edward's hand tightly; our fist-five had lingered again, and he was staring directly at our hands.

"Oh shit, I'm sorry," he apologized, quickly moving his hand away from mine and into his front pocket. "I should—I should go," he said, and he started towards the other direction, to his own classroom.

But without thinking, I suddenly pulled his hand and locked him in a tight embrace, and I felt tears well up in my eyes again, tears of joy, and of hope. I blinked them away, and in a second, they were gone.

"Thank you," I said, my ear against his chest. I could hear his heartbeat—it was thumping, fast. I brushed it off and let go of the embrace, and I gave him another smile. "I'll be heading to class now," I said, and secured my backpack over my shoulder again and made my way towards the door, leaving Edward standing alone in the hallway.

I sank into my seat as I reached my desk, my cheeks feeling hot again, a warm feeling engulfing me. I just hugged Edward Cullen.

* * *

**I've written a future chapter for this story, but for now, I'm feel like I'm experiencing a bad case of writers' block. If any of you would be so kind as to help me with my little dilemma, I'd be extremely grateful, and will credit you as well in the next chapters if we do end up collaborating on ideas. Drop me a line if you have the time!**


End file.
